Thursday, June 24, 2010

Humans, War, and the Killer Chimps

Oh dear. This is the kind of story that can make life seem like a jungle.

You know how humans love to wage war, slaughter their neighbours, and steal their land?

Well now we know who to blame for those bad habits. 

After years of field observations in Uganda's Kibale National Park, John Mitani of the University of Michigan and several colleagues have concluded that chimps wage war to conquer new territory.

But of course, sadly, we are also to blame. Because it takes two to tango.

And as I once explained, we really should have gone with the bonobos. 

The Pan troglodytes chimps he studies are one of two subspecies. The other is called Pan paniscus, also known as bonobos, and, says Mitani, "the latter, as far as we know, aren't nearly as aggressive with respect to intergroup relations. Yet they're equally close to us."

Who prefer to make love not war. With everyone. All the time.

Instead of dating those violent  chimps.

And look, not only do those hunky bonobos  prefer sex to killing. They also share their food.

What a concept eh?

Oh boy. Some mistakes you can recover Stephen Harper and his Cons. Just flush them down the toilet and start all over again.

But when you make the kind of monkey mistake we made so long ago.

It can haunt us FOREVER...

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