Friday, June 11, 2010

The Sad Story of Korny and Corn Cob

I think I liked Kory Teneycke better when he was Corn Cob Bob's daddy.

You know Korny and Corny the environmental crusaders. It was a sweet relationship. It had its ups and downs.

 "Our fearless mascot, Corn Cob Bob has launched a hunger strike in protest of the decision to ban our ads," said Teneycke. "We hope Telecaster reverses its decision before Bob expires along with freedom of speech."

But at least it was noble.

Of course all that changed when Korny went to work for Great Monster Mobster Leader...

Which was a scary experience for him AND for us. 

I mean who can forget poor democracy? Or Korny following Lisa Raitt around trying to get her to memorize her lines? Good theatre it wasn't.

But then neither was his next and most pitiful performance to date.

Trying to impersonating Rush Limbaugh Corn Cob on the Evian Solomon Politics and Whatever Show.

When of course he's far too thin,  far too boring, and the way he curled his lips when he snarled was positively WEEVIL.

Although the real Korny did blow a kernel make his mark eh? His attack on poor Frank Graves was a new low in journalism.

Which is why I am not surprised he's trying to set up a Fox News North.

And neither is Don Newman.

The first time I met Kory Teneycke, he told me that Canada needed a Fox News channel of its own.

I impolitely told him what he could do with the idea and we didn't speak again for four years.

Oh Korny you shoulda listened to the Donster. I mean would you watch the Blogging Tories if it was a TV show?

Neither would I. Although I suppose that's what that ratfuck faux Fox network will probably look like in its dying days.

With Stephen Taylor reading the news, and the latest Con talking points. Dr Roy performing "miracle" well as reading horoscopes. And Ezra Levant doing the Free Hate Speech times a day.

And the weather... 

As well as urging viewers to send in loonies, quarters, bottle tops, ANYTHING, to keep the network on the air.

Oh Korny what have you done? You could have been a CONTENDAH. Now you're going to end up looking like just another bum who thought Canada was Amerika.

Do yourself a favour go back to Corn Cob Bob. I'm sure he misses you a lot.

Pop me Daddy !!!  Pop me Daddy !!!

Kornhole listen to me. I'm KNOW you can claw yourself back to respectability. And be an almost wunderkind again.

But it won't be easy eh? A sorta nice guy in a Con world. That's HARD.

Just ask Ralphie...  

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