Sunday, March 11, 2018

Doug Ford and the Con Clown Horror Show

I know I predicted that the Ontario PC leadership race would be a Con clown show, and it was.

Their convention was a total disaster. 

It dragged on for hours with no result. Nobody knew what was happening.

And then they had to tell everybody to leave, because the room had been booked for a bodybuilding show.

Which went down like a lead balloon, with the enraged Cons booing their own party officials.

While I howled with laughter.

But then as we know this leadership race was also a horror show.

Which began when the Con's disgraced leader Patrick Brown resigned over a sex scandal, then changed his mind and came roaring or stumbling back.

Only to confuse midnight with noon.

And have to return to his political coffin, in a hurry...

Which I found hilarious since as you know I LOVE Con horror stories.

But of course, the Ontario Cons now have an ape for a leader.

Doug Ford, a former Toronto city councillor who became a household name during his brother's scandal-plagued mayoralty, captured Ontario's Progressive Conservative leadership in a stunning come-from-behind win late Saturday night.

Shortly after 10 p.m., hours behind schedule, the party announced that Mr. Ford won on the third ballot, narrowly defeating former Tory MPP Christine Elliott.

Unless the stench of corruption loosens his grip on power.

In a statement just after midnight, Ms. Elliott said that she would not concede after her campaign was "made aware of serious irregularities with respect to this leadership race."

And Doug Ford, as Michael Coren reminds us, is a threat to this country and its values:

A man who is as dumb, and as brutish, and as bigoted, as his late and unlamented brother Robbie.

A man and a family with a murky past.

One who is more Trumpkin than Canadian...

And one who like Andrew Scheer, is in hock to the social conservatives who made him leader.

Which is of course the good news.

For now when you attack Ford, you also attack Schmear.

And just like the balloons the poor Cons never got to use...

We're going to pop one after the other.

And what with his record, and all the scandals we have to use against him.

Ape Ford will lead the way.

By hitting the ground with a sickening thud...

Please don't forget to wave as he flies by.

Bye Bye Dougie.

Bye Bye Cons...


  1. It seems the Reformatories haven't released the vote tallies yet. Maybe they hope more delay will make people like you less likely to examine the totals with care. Good luck with that. Byron may not want people to see that he ordered Miss Nepotism to turn Neanderthal and send her voters to Ford. As the good Muldoon said himself, " There's no whore like an old whore ".

    My favorite moment was the reporter standing between two piles of stacked chairs. Symbolic of the whole fiasco.

    1. Hi rumleyfips...The whole Con leadership race reeked of corruption, with more "missing voters" than anyone could count. It will indeed be interesting to examine the totals, and see who exactly put Ape Ford over the top. I only hope that this result and others will finally convince progressives to stop fighting each other, and unite to fight the real enemy....

  2. Anonymous1:05 PM

    Doug is going to beat Wynne. Scheer, Ford, Trump, and Kenney in power at the same time. Then you won't be laughing.

    It'll almost be as good as your reaction when Trump became prez.

    "Waaaaaaa, I can't even!"

    1. Anonymous3:55 PM

      "Scheer, Ford, Trump, and Kenney."

      Is that the Four Horsemen of the Incompetent? Or the Incontinent?

      mr perfect

    2. Anonymous4:00 PM

      The Four Stooges. Very funny.

    3. Jackie Blue4:02 PM

      And of course that's all you sadistic trolls care about is "liberal tears," and not what's good for your country. Trump's puppeteer Putin just blamed "the Jews" for election meddling, because of course it's (((those people))) and not the Kremlin. Anyone but the Kremlin. Which means anyone in league with Trump, ideologically or otherwise, is in league with a literal Russian Nazi.

      You do know we fought a war over this, right? You're O.K. with the buildup to another Holocaust happening, this time in North America? I guess we'll just have to fight another war against you brownshirts so that you get the message this time. You're a disgrace to your grandfathers and you all ought to be charged with hate crimes and treason.

      High-tail your soory ass back to Moscow or whatever sticky puddle of the tar swamp in Alberta you came from. Scum like you aren't welcome in civilized society.

    4. Hi anon@1:05PM...stop exaggerating, like most decent people I was shocked by Trump's "victory." I had no idea he could be declared the winner when Clinton got three million more votes than he did. But I've never shed a single solitary tear over any Con victory, they just motivate me to want to destroy them even more than I already do. If that's possible. And I feel the same way about Ford as I do Trump. The orange oaf will help destroy the Republicans, and the Ford ape will destroy the Cons...

      P.S...are you still mourning Robbie? Because I'm still celebrating his untimely demise, and I'd feel so much better about my shameful behaviour if you were still weeping. WAAAAAH.....😂😂😂

    5. Hi Mr Perfect....that's a very good question. Are Scheer, Ford, Trump, and Kenney, the Four Horsemen of the Incompetent or the Incontinent? And I'm afraid my guess is they are both. Which is of course truly disturbing and really messy...😳

  3. Just like I predicted Trump would beat the worst Democratic Candidate in history, I predict Ford will beat a run down Wynne.

    People want change, people want honest goverment, and straight talk. Ford can deliver change, as for the other two well I doubt he is any different than the elite.

    The greens have a chance to seize the day, be bold greenies.

    1. Hi Steve...Wynne is not the strongest candidate at this point, but there is also Horwath, and Ape Ford makes both women look good. I suspect that progressives will unite behind the candidate who does best against the Fordling, and will end up defeating him handily. And I don't want to be rude, but if you think and member of the Ford crime family can deliver honest government you must be more delude an I imagined. Ford is an ugly bigoted bully, a misogynist, a homophobe, and an idiot climate change denier, and he must be totally destroyed as an example to all the others....

    2. e.a.f.4:55 PM

      of course Ford can deliver change, but so can a hurricane, tidal wave, earth quake, etc. but is it the type of change Canada/Ontario needs? Not so much. it maybe that Ford can win an election and then the people of Ontario can live with it or die because of it. I'm sure the lawyers are getting ready if he is elected. Sort of like Harper who passed 8 pieces of Leg. which were over turned by the Supreme court of Canada.

      Ford does not have a "savory" back ground. It might make for some fun Liberal ads come election time. A brother who smoked crack while Mayor of Toronto, allegations of Doug selling dope in his younger years, gee what could go wrong with that?

    3. but we will get both a monorail to nowhere and a ferris wheel over the sewage plant

  4. Thought you might enjoy this video about the NHS - and children's literature - from the 2012 London Olympics: And think of Aneurin Bevan, and Tommy Douglas...

    1. Jackie Blue4:21 PM

      I only found out recently Tommy Douglas was Kiefer Sutherland's maternal grandfather. Wow, Canada's a small world for such a big country. (The Matthew Perry meme caught me off-guard too.) I proposed an idea the other day on another blog that for that reason alone, Kief ought to appear in PSAs promoting universal healthcare in the U.S. After all, if anything could get rank-and-file Republicans on board, it's a ringing endorsement from "Jack Bauer." Just don't tell anyone in Trumpland that he's from "Soviet Canuckistan" (let alone that grandpa belonged to a party that was to the left of Trudeau fils et père), or they'll riot over (cough) "foreign meddling"... ��

    2. Hi Lagatta...I vividly remember watching that tribute to the NHS, and being incredibly moved. Especially since the Cons in Britain had done it such damage, and have since done even more to try to kill it and privatize it. Fortunately, there are many great doctors and nurses who work for it, as I personally discovered when they took care of me after my motorcycle accident in Scotland last summer. The NHS and our medicare system are living treasures, and must be defended to the death against the Cons who would destroy them...

    3. hi Jackie...Kiefer Sutherland did an excellent PSA for our medicare system years ago:

      And another one on the need for progressive healthcare reform in your country:

      But yes, I think Jack Bauer needs to get on the case again, and help make it part of the Democrat's election platform...

    4. Simon, have you read Bevan's life story? He had a stammer as the future King George XI did, and it caused him great probems at school, but as a lad who was a miner's son in a Welsh mining village, had to sort this out himself. His wife Jennie Lee was a Scot from the same class background, and quite a fiery Labour left MP as well. She was as much the mother of the Open University as he was the father of the NHS.

      Thanks for the Kiefer Sutherland clips. I have no idea who Jack Bauer is; I almost never watch TV, except news and documentaries that I watch on the computer (no TV; I do like to watch footie matches at my neighbourhood Italian cafés but that is as much for the ambience - and espresso - as the sport).

  5. Anonymous3:16 PM

    Simon, I fear Ontario will need to get punched in the mouth hard to realize the error of its ways. Hopefully the damage is limited to one term.

    1. Jackie Blue4:08 PM

      Let's see if the spineless invertebrates in the con hack press ask Dougie Doughboy about the company he keeps.

      Yet another Islamophobic RWNJ Internet personality -- not Ezra, surprisingly enough, but some other guy who's been charged with a hate crime in Canada and has since gone over to Burma to be a shit-disturbing propagandist against the Rohingya -- has given a ringing endorsement to Dope Dealer Doug.

      Trump "never heard of" David Duke, right? Has Doug "ever heard of" Kevin Johnston? Certainly there must be a reason why such an odious person feels kinship with the party's presumptive nominee? Inquiring minds want to know!

      Anyone? Anyone? Barton? Coyne? Bueller?

    2. Hi anon@3:16...maybe you'd be right, if we didn't have the example of Donald Trump to warn us of the error of voting for a dumb demagogue. I think people are forgetting that even quite a few Cons won't vote for him, so if progressives vote smartly he should be defeated. The thought of having a low class moron like that Fordzilla administering an $800 billion budget is too absurd to even contemplate...

    3. Anonymous6:24 PM

      Hahahaha don't kid yourself. The #NeverFord crowd will be thinner than #NeverTrump amongst Conservatives. They are an ignorant and power hungry lot.

    4. I presume he'd defund all Ontario provincial bicycle paths and pedestrian footways - including infrastructure adapted for disabled pedestrians, cyclists and mobility vehicle users.

      What a P.O.S. sorry: that's an insult to the brown stuff that makes the flowers grow.

  6. Jackie Blue3:53 PM

    Well, there's another good thing to take away from this shitshow: Hambone Marshall went home empty-handed, as Ivanka Mulroney didn't make it either. And as objectionable as the cons truly are, even they told Deplorebel Media to get lost, as Menzoid the Hemorrhoid tweeted late last night. Whether or not "I.T. Guy" ends up jumping in the driver's seat of the Ford Pinto clown car remains to be seen. But hopefully Ezra's perfect zero record holds steady through 2019, and sends Proud Boy packing in tears right back to the confession booth.

    Any or all of the Filipino bodybuilders would probably make a better leader than the dumbbell cons. Can't wait to see Dotard Doug's audition for the CBC adaptation of Breaking Bad, in a video recorded live from his basement meth lab -- er, campaign headquarters. Like idiot brother, like idiot brother.

    1. Hi Jackie...I shudder to think how the Con stooges in the media are going to cover Doug Ford. I wouldn't be surprised if they claimed that Fird is bad, but Wynne is worse, such is their misogyny. And of course racism has never bothered those good ol' white boys, and homophobia isn't even on their radar. But that's OK, like Ford will do to the Cons, they will only destroy themselves. And you're right, at least Hamish Marshall came out looking like a loser. Again. And Caroline Mulroney will have to explain why she hired Ezra Levant's little bumboy for the rest of her life. Bad things happen to people like her, and pleading dumb is not an option...l

  7. Anonymous3:55 PM

    What a frightening sight of King Bong on the CN tower Simon. Did he chase Christine Elliott up there or is he protecting his stash of bananas and hash?
    I'm not surprised that Christine Elliott wont concede to what can be best described as another Con debacle. And we're to believe that these clowns could ever run the government of Ontario? Under Doug Ford? Have you driven a Ford lately?
    I believe Ms. Elliott's loss has more to do with her gender than anything else. The misogynist good old boys network of Cons just couldn't stomach the thought of a female leader and as they did with Tim Hudak, Patrick Brown and now Doug Ford, ensured that Christine never had a chance. On the federal level, it was no accident that Rona was chosen as interim leader as it effectively prevented her from running and quite possibly winning that race.
    So as the storm clouds of controversy engulf Ford's "win" and we await his plans to make Ontario great again, the very unpopular Kathleen Wynne should seriously consider stepping down to allow a fresh face to tackle Ford rather than handing him the win and Wynne on a silver platter.

  8. Hi JD...yes it is a scary sight seeing King Bong clambering all over the CN tower, especially since the tower is in my backyard. And if he is indeed hiding his stay of hash up there I might also have to climb up there and investigate. 👮🏻
    I also agree that misogyny helps explain why Ford won, for it's all over this country, and it stinks to high heaven. As for Kathleen Wynne, it probably would have been very helpful if she had stepped down a few months ago, because she is very unpopular and stirs up the bestial Cons like Hillary Clinton stirs them up, in the United States. But it's too late for that now, and at least Wynne has some good policies to offer Ontarians, which is more than King Bong does. Also, if Wynne does flag near the finishing line there is also Andrea Horwath. I have never been too impressed with her, but she is still infinitely better than Ford. Progressives are going to have to be very smart, and put their petty quarrels aside, or they will regret it forever....

    1. I think in the end Wynne will make this about policy. Unfortunately Cons dont do policy. All those people making a potential $15 an hour better come out and vote. Ford Nation is full of them and as usual will vote against their self interest to defeat the so called elite.

      The joke is the only reason the Fords are not elites is they prefer to be white trash.