Saturday, September 06, 2008
How to Avoid a Harper Majority
By the time you read this I will have moved into my new bunker in a secret location somewhere in Canada.
You see it suddenly hit me like a taser. We're only about 38 days from a possible Stephen Harper majority and I can't be TOO prepared. In the past I've been known to call Great Pig Leader a MONSTER....and I always will. Oink. Oink. So I can only imagine what might happen to me if the RepubliCons seize Total Power.
I can see myself locked up at some sinister Homosexuality Disorder and Discipline Centre run by Stockwell Day. Right next to the Mother Theresa "Rehabilitation" Camp for women who have had an abortion ....and their supporters. And the Jesus Hates You Camp for atheists.
Where between bouts of electric shock treatment to my private parts, I'll be forced to pretend I'm straight, memorize Great Pappy Porker's boring speeches, take Jason Kenney or John Baird to the Purity Ball, and of course, PRAY a lot.
In Con Canada that'll be COMPULSORY. Three times a day....or else.
Which is why I am praying right now that Dana's excellent plan succeeds.
We really do have only one chance to eliminate Harper from the playing board.
We can find a way to take that chance now or we can find a way to take it after the big damage is done.
Big damage or temporary, strategic coalition.
Exactly. Just like they do in other civilized countries. But for some reason our rabidly partisan friends never even talk about.
And if we can't get the left to unite, or form a coalition, can't we at least agree to share riding polling numbers a few days before the election? So we can vote strategically and at least deny the Cons a majority. Please? Isn't Canada worth it ? WTF ?
Anyway, I gotta signoff. I'm running low on power. Sébastien has been pedalling the generator for fifteen minutes and he's chuffed.
But before I go I just want to say I'm kidding around tonight, because I need to cheer myself up. But a Harper majority would NOT be a joke. It would be like a knife through the heart of our beautiful country. And we CAN'T let it happen.
So if our side ever stops fighting itself.
And needs an attack dog.
To bite the foul Cons in the ass.
Or help BOUNCE them from power.
Have a great weekend everyone!!
Isn't freedom WONDERFUL?
Enjoy it while you can...