Stephen Harper and the Great North Pole Farce

Who can forget how Stephen Harper shocked the world a few months ago by suddenly and loudly declaring that the North Pole belonged to Canada?

Even though it actually belongs to Denmark.

But who knew the stunning proclamation also sent shockwaves through the cowed ranks of his own civil servants?

New documents suggest that Canada's last-minute decision to stretch its claim to the Arctic seabed all the way to the North Pole took federal bureaucrats just as off-guard as it did the rest of the world.

Or that this last minute Con production was such an absolute FARCE.

Days before the Dec. 6, 2013, submission was due, records show Foreign Affairs lawyers were still sorting out the difference between the geographic, magnetic and geomagnetic poles. 

"There are apparently three North Poles," reads a Nov. 21 email.

Or that John Baird would be so desperate he would summon up Santa...



Old press releases about Santa Claus's purported Canadian citizenship were dredged up. By Nov. 29, Baird's office was demanding a complete list of everyone who had been previously consulted about the submission.

Or that Jason Kenney had to be deployed to invoke a higher power...



Or that they almost forgot to tell Denmark.

Eventually, someone remembered Canada's allies. "We will have to provide some info for our embassy in Denmark at some point," reads a Dec. 4 note.

Or that it was such a Con clown show.

"The whole thing just reeks of amateurism," said Michael Byers, an Arctic expert and professor of international law at the University of British Columbia. "It sounds like the decision-makers had no idea as to the actual facts of the situation and were making up policy without any reference to international law or to decades of diplomatic practice on this issue."

But then of course as Byers points out, Stephen Harper knows that the North Pole almost certainly belongs to Denmark. But he also knows that the claim won't be settled until after the next election.

So he can act like a Con artist, lie like a thief, pose as a Great Strong Leader of the True North Strong and Free.

Or a Great Explorer Leader...



The one who discovered the remains of the Franklin Expedition.

And use this sorry farce for maximum political advantage...



And when you think about all of that, and how one last minute decision from the Con cult leader, or one of the voices in his head, threw the whole Con regime into a frenzy.

And made him look like a dangerous maniac, and the rest of us look like idiots in the eyes of the world.

You really have to wonder how long this farce can go on before we're humiliated beyond recognition eh?

And all I can say is, Great Polar Bear God of the Great White North.

Please save us from that deranged leader, that shameless Con artist.

As soon as is humanly bearly possible.

And in any way you can...



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