Tuesday, May 17, 2011

When the Media is the Enema

Well I must admit it's looking bleak out there. It's been raining for days. The traffic cones are sagging like most of the population. And the Dark Lord of Canada is working feverishly in his castle preparing to unveil his zombie cabinet under a cone of silence.

The pieces of Stephen Harper’s cabinet shuffle are all in place and those on the move have been given their orders – but no one’s talking and the Prime Minister’s enjoying it.

Because he would eh? Before The Thousand Year Majority the message to the faithful hog hordes was: You talk, you fired.  Now it's you squeal, you DIE. And he does so enjoy seeing fear in the eyes of others.

Meanwhile, in a hopefully secure location, the man who wrote Harperland, awaits his grim fate calmly. Trying to find a flicker of light in The Great Darkness.

Liberalism has become a bore. It dims the imagination. It’s mush. By contrast, the New Democrats have some ideological teeth. They can speak with authenticity of voice for social democratic values.

But not quite succeeding.

Just like the Liberals, the New Democrats are at a huge financial disadvantage. When the Conservatives feel so inclined, they’ll strike with brutal advertising that the NDP won’t have the resources to rebut. Does anyone think Thomas Mulcair’s outburst about Osama bin Laden won’t be aired countless times when the appropriate moment arrives? Or Jack Layton’s massage-parlour visit? Don’t put it past the Conservatives.

And who can blame him for feeling down eh? When his own colleagues in the corporate media are doing the Con's dirty work for them.

They suckle the hands teats that feed them. They know what their bosses want. The socialist conspiracy must be crushed and humiliated. So first it was Jack Does the Massage Parlour. Now it's Jack and Olivia do Disney World.

When they didn't do anything wrong. Or anything other MPs don't do. And their real "crime" was daring to address union members.

But so it begins. In The Thousand Year Majority there can be only one message: Big Daddy Knows Best. The Media is Mein. And anyone who doesn't submit will be destroyed by my mighty attack ads.

The good news? At least now even the dumbest must realize that this is an ideological war, a class war. And that Big Media is the enemy enema. So we can attack them, mock them, flush them out of our lives, and set up our own progressive new media networks. 

The even better news? We've got four years to give the Cons a taste of their own medicine. Bombard them with our attack ads, and use the internet to encourage people to mobilize and protest in the streets.

And with the artists of Canada on our side, one thing is for sure eh?

We can do prop-art better than they can...

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