Saturday, February 20, 2016

Ezra Levant and the Rebel Cruise From Hell

As we all know, when Ezra Levant isn't spouting hate, he's begging for money.

And him and his trusty sidekick Brian Lilley have been known to do or say anything to raise the cash they need to keep their bigot boat afloat.

Or sell anything.

But all that cheap swag, and all those five dollar contributions, can't keep The Rebel going, or pay for Levant's hefty legal bills.

So now he has come up with his most ambitious fundraising project EVER.
A cruise through the Caribbean with the Rebel gang.

Where for a few thousand bucks the faithful can ride the waves, hear the Rebel Commander explain why he believes that both Obama and Justin Trudeau are closet Muslims.

While leaning or lying on a groaning buffet table.

Or they can hang out in the bar and listen to the ghastly redneck Sheila Gunn Reid tell them why she's a REAL journalist.

And drink until they believe it. 

Or else...

On a cool night, the Rebel flock can gather in the karaoke room, and have the right-wing anti-Muslim fanatic Daniel Pipes whip them into a frenzy...

As only he can.

Or squeeze into a crowded sauna and sweat up a river listening to the depraved misogynist Milo Yiannopoulos expand on his theory that feminism is cancer...

And try to sell them a t-shirt. 

And if or when the Caribbean sun, or all that inflammatory bullshit, or the sight of Levant in a bathing suit.

Or nothing at all...

Causes them to overheat.

They can always get a swimming lesson from Brian "The Fish" Lilley...

Which unlike anything Lilley has ever said or written, might actually come in useful.

Judging by what happened recently on a voyage of the Nieuw Amsterdam, the ship the Rebel Cruise will be travelling on...

Gawd. One can only hope that if it happens, the ship tilts to the extreme right. Or they'll blame us, or Rachel Notley, or Justin Trudeau.

Or even better, hope that if they are hit by a sudden storm, it's one caused by global warming.

So they can blame themselves.

But then of course you know that even if the worst happens, and Levant does get a bad case of diarrhoea, and they do have to abandon ship.

He will find a way to turn it into a fundraising opportunity...

For that's what it's all about. Making money for Ezra. Turning bigotry into a business.

It really couldn't be more obscene.

Those Con artists couldn't be more shameless. Some people really are suckers.

And sooner or later The Rebel will go down...

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  1. Stupid Pipes, everyone has a sacred cow or two. Mention raising taxes (especially on the 1%) and witness the Rebel crew and it's one or two readers shriek or throw feces.

    Theme for this cruise?

    There's got to be a morning after
    If we can hold on post election night
    We have a chance to beg the fools for money
    So we can keep on shilln' for the right

    Oh, can't you see the morning after
    It's waiting right outside the (oil and Con collapse) storm
    Why don't we cross that neglected bridge together
    And find a wingnut billionaire that's safe and warm

    1. hi Dan...that's good, I'm going to have to put that one to music, so it can be played by the Con band as the SS Harper goes down with all hands.

      P.S.Maybe we should add a line : Nearer my Steve than thee... ;)

  2. ExMTLer16426:34 AM

    Ship of Fools.
    (Damn, that was too easy.)

    1. hi ExMTLer1642... Well it may be a bit too easy, but you're right, so I'm giving you full marks for that one... ;)

  3. I imagine that EL and his crazed followers believe that cruising to various tax havens a few days after one of their idols becomes US President will be a fine time to talk up their plans for our country. Great research Simon. Since apparently now thanks Ezra we are all " journalists " we ought to apply to press passes and join the high seas debacle? Or not.

    1. hi Nordic Jim... Thanks, I keep a file on anyone associated with The Rebel mob. I want to make sure everyone knows what a scummy gang they are. Take Yiannopoulos for example, he's so disgusting Twitter is refusing to verify him. But no, we should all become journalists, but being trapped at sea with the Rebel freaks would definitely ruin my vacation. Gawd. There must be a way of warning the other passengers...

  4. The Love Boat (Theme)

    Maybe Ezra will have Harper on board to entertain the passengers! 8-)

    The Hate Boat (Theme)

    Hate, exciting and new.
    Come aboard. We're expecting you.
    Hate, life's sweetest reward.
    Let it flow, let the hate flow through you.

    The Hate Boat soon will be making another run,
    The Hate Boat promises something for everyone,
    Set a course for adventure, our minds on a new Action Plan.

    Our hate will hurt the PM
    With our devious smiles, it's us against him.
    It's hate!
    Welcome aboard
    It's hate!

    "Let the hate flow through you."
    ―Emperor Palpatine, to Luke Skywalker on the Death Star II

    1. hi David....That's a good name for it, the Hate Boat. And yes it would be nice to see Harper playing with the Titanic band, as the ship keels over and heads to the bottom....

  5. Anonymous11:23 AM

    You need to inform right thinking people that the Niew Amsterdam is a Holland America Cruise line, so they know who to boycott.

    I will never sail on Holland America or its cruise brands that include Carnival Cruise Line, Holland America Line, Princess Cruises and Seabourn in North America; P&O Cruises and Cunard in the United Kingdom; AIDA Cruises in Germany; Costa Cruises in Southern Europe; and P&O Cruises in Australia.

    There are other choices out there.

    1. hi's clearly mention in the Rebel pamphlet. But yes we can't take any chances, and we must do something to warn the other passengers. Or with Levant at the buffet table, they could all come down with diarrhoea... ;)

  6. Anonymous12:03 PM

    The mind boggles at the thought of frenzied, booze fueled Rebels caged up on a cruise ship for 10 days. Would not want to be around when the hallucinations start and the concealed weapons come into play. Its a perfect setup for a Darwin award but in true Con fashion it would likely be some elderly couple celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary that would get caught in the crossfire.

    1. hi RT....that's a wonderful image, unless of course you're an innocent passenger and you're vacation is ruined by the sight of such a mob, Or woken up in the middle the night by the sound of them howling under the Caribbean moon, or by Sheila Gunn Reid firing her concealed weapon out of her port hole...

  7. Technically speaking, wouldn't that be a Rebel Cruise TO Hell?

    1. hi David...well that would be a more optimistic headline. But as you know I hate to predict the future, so all I can do is warn about that floating horror, so hopefully no innocent passengers will be hurt and all the other ships can get out of its way...

  8. Anonymous4:59 PM

    I think it would be great to sign up for the cruise, and wear hidden spyware to record all the stuff that happens on the cruise. One's informal conversations with Levant, Lilley, Gunn-Reid etc. and then come back and offer the footage to:

    The Fifth Estate




    or make your own documentary.

    1. hi that's a good idea. That would make up for being trapped at see with such a disgusting group. And I'm sure it would make a fascinating documentary or really scary horror movie. I'm hoping Lezra makes a YouTube video so I can grab some images and make my version...

  9. Anonymous5:07 PM

    See comments section:

    1. hi anon...thanks for the link. I see some people aren't too impressed with Ezra's new venture.

      A cruise with Ezzra??
      Is this even a thing?…people would pay for this?

      It is just Ezra trying to figure out another way of getting people to throw money at him. I wonder how many percent of the actual costs goes to the cruise itself, and how much goes directly into Ezra’s pockets.

      I can already picture Ezra on the cruise, trying to sell copies of Ethical Oil or other Rebel merchandise. Well, assuming the cruise doesn’t get cancelled due to a lack of interest.

      It'll be interesting to see how many Rebel readers he will be able to attract, because I can't see him luring too many....

  10. e.a.f.5:43 AM

    ya gotta do what ya gotta do to stay afloat. wish all of them the best of luck on their cruise.

    OMG. oh, well on the bright side, they may decide that some of them aren't "right" enough and lean the ship to far to the left and over they go. Can you imagine "regular" customers being on that cruise ship with all those bigots. That may yet be the cruise from hell. This could get ugly, given many of the staff on cruise ships are people of colour. Well if the whole thing takes place in international waters, the rebels might want to look out before they become the has beens and shark bait.

    1. hi e.a.f...don't wish them good luck, or they might not hit that iceberg or that reef. But thanks for the tip. I must send a telegram to the staff, especially the cooks, so they can whip up a buffet the Rebels will never forget. One guaranteed to keep them running to the toilet every fifteen minutes...

    2. e.a.f.2:18 AM

      good idea Simon because those "rebels" are a bunch of shit heads. I do wish them luck, but it wasn't good luck. Them being sea sick should be enough.

  11. Anonymous11:51 AM

    Interesting to see the desperate measures cons will go to as the tar money dries up and there is far less to go around. Not conducive to good table manners.


  12. Anonymous12:59 PM

    I hope Ezra doesn't forget to order the bag of dicks before setting sail, those things might be hard to come by once they are on the high seas. He should be able to contact fellow idea-log Jon Ritzheimer through US Corrections as I understand Jon Boy has the contacts to acquire said hardware.

    mr perfect

  13. Guy who shouts things at bus station granted Alberta legislature press pass

  14. How many know ISIS is sometimes referred to as the Islamic State of Iraq and the LEVANT? Coincidence?

    Maybe Ezra is a double agent! 8-)