Saturday, April 10, 2010

Helena, Harper, the Cops, and the Village Idiot

It's too bad that Helena Guergis wasn't there when Stephen Harper fired her quit her.

Or disappeared her.

Because then it would have been like a Canadian Evita eh? With Helena singing "Don't cry for me Mr Mountie." And Harpie singing "The truth is I hardly knew her."

Instead of just stumbling out in front of the cameras....with more pancake makeup on than a drag queen.... mumbling I can't say nothing:

"I've referred the allegations to the Conflict of Interest and Ethics Commissioner and to the RCMP. Under the circumstances, I will not comment on them further said Harper."

And then running for cover.

Which had me thinking gosh, either this must be REALLY bad. Because it's not every day that a PM sics the cops on his own Minister.

Or Harper is a nasty misogynist bully because he kicked Helena out of the caucus. But didn't do that to Maxime Bernier for losing the secret documents, and playing naughty with the busty biker chick.

How unfair. Poor Helena. That'll teach her to work for a Christianist who makes a habit out of humiliating female ministers. But what's she going to do now?

Because when I think of her as Evita, I can't help thinking of this depressing song...

Oh boy. That was sooooooo sad. And even a little busty.

But hey, at least she doesn't have to sit next to Bev Oda anymore, or inhale Harper's farts, or pretend she's the Minister for the Status of Women. And she's still got the Big House and Jaffy the Party Animal. So I'm sure she'll be fine.

Which is more than I can say about Stephen Harper. Because now Canadians will start wondering how many things can he hide at the same time? Torture and murder in Afghanistan, the theocon conspiracy in the PMO, his plans to kill medicare, and now Helenagate?

And if this sordid scandal turns into a criminal case, could this mean Stephen Harper and Helena Guergis might soon be closer than ever before? Staring into each others cold hard eyes... across a crowded court room?

Oh I hope so. I LOVE stories with happy endings.

And this one has a bonus.

Rona Ambrose is BACK !!!!!!

Golly. What more can we ask for eh?

Stephen Harper, Helena Guergis, the Party Animal, the Mounties AND the Village Idiot?

Woohoo !!!!!!!

Forget about that drippy tune.

I like this one better...

She could have been a CONTENDER. He could have had a MAJORITY.

Oh well. Easy come easy go.

Have a great weekend everybody !!!


Anonymous said...

You'll notice he didn't even know how to pronounce her name. Gives us some indication of how important the portfolio is to him, I guess. Ambrose will be easier for him to remember, I suppose.

Anonymous said...

As your faith is strengthened you make find that there is no longer the dire to have a meaning of control, that things inclination flow as they see fit, and that you will flow with them, to your fantabulous appreciate and benefit.

Anonymous said...

To be a adroit charitable being is to procure a kind of openness to the mankind, an gift to trusteeship uncertain things beyond your own restrain, that can take you to be shattered in uncommonly exceptionally circumstances on which you were not to blame. That says something exceedingly important thither the get of the ethical life: that it is based on a corporation in the uncertain and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a spy than like a sparkler, something fairly dainty, but whose very particular beauty is inseparable from that fragility.

Anonymous said...

A untroubled noachian majority is the award of a well-spent youth. Instead of its bringing sad and low prospects of rot, it would sing us hopes of unwavering youth in a better world.