Bigots ,Boo Gays, and the Night The Party Died

What can you say when in the gay capital of the world they had to cancel this big Halloween party in the Castro?

Because of the threat of violence.

The festivities started decades ago as a homegrown celebration for San Francisco's gay and lesbian community, but has drawn a scarier element in recent years. In 2002, five people were stabbed. Three years ago, someone wandered the crowds wielding a chain saw.

Last year, nine revelers were shot when a confrontation between two groups of young people erupted into gunfire, despite ramped-up security.

What can you say when a gay party...to which everyone gay and straight is invited...is attacked by thugs? Just like the ones who used to attack gay people on Canada's National Homophobia Day.

What can you say about the insane hate aimed at gay love? And the fevered way they maul our lives.

The Gays. They are all over the news lately...And why shouldn't they be? What other topic evokes such anger? What other subject can cause a conversation to devolve into sermons, with people intoning the Bible like the sky was swirling above them in almighty agreement? Certainly not the wars causing all that death. Maybe evolution? Science? Booor-ring! Let's talk about the Gays!

Or exclude us from their world.

While the center stage of the drama "Boo Gays" is occupied by conservative religious groups there are other players lurking in the background, over by the fake tree and cardboard sun. This is a group of people who don't identify themselves as homophobic, per se, (who would want to be some crazy Bible-thumper?) but still don't accept homosexuals as "regular" people.

A gay couple raising a family is somehow weirder than housewives swinging around stripper poles at the local Crunch for their husbands. Hmm.

What can you say about all of that that doesn't sound despairing?

Except this...no matter what the homophobes say or do we're fighting for our human rights...and we'll never stop fighting until we win.. and we get them. As we will. And we're left the fuck alone to live our lives....like everyone else.

Oh yes...and that no matter what they say or do...

Halloween is and always will be Gay Christmas !!!

Have a happy and safe one everyone....

Halloween and my Top Five Scary Movies

It's the night before Halloween and not even a miserable carved pumpkin is stirring in the bunker. For some reason...and remind me NOT to think too much about it...the Pagan Festival doesn't seem to be as popular with the French guys as it is with the English ones.

And the worse thing is I can't even go OUT and party. I busted up my foot playing soccer on Saturday and I'm hobbling around on crutches.

Oh well. At least there are all those Halloween movies on TV....

I'm not really a big fan of horror films.... but when I saw this list....and being bored out of my mind...I thought I'd come up with my own TOP 5 SCARY MOVIES.

So here they are....

(5) HARPERSTEIN'S HIDDEN AGENDA:

I haven't seen this movie yet....but the trailer is terrifying. Especially the part when the mask falls off.....John Baird screams.... Dion faints....the wingnuts wail...and Harperstein starts knifing Canada.

(4) THE STALKING :

This movie is a recurring nightmare....and a GAY one too!!! My friends don't think it's THAT scary. But how would YOU like being wooed by Aaron Unruh?

Why is he ALWAYS coming after me ? And is he wearing a hockey mask or is that his real face?

(3) JAWS:

Seriously now...I think this horror movie had the biggest influence on my life. I used to LOVE to swim in the sea at night. Now I don't dare....not even in Lake Ontario. Which is just as well. Because if the Big Eel doesn't get you...the toxic chemicals will.

(2) PSYCHO

This was also a seminal movie. I never take a shower in a hotel without locking the door.
Especially when Sébastien is in there with me. I'd hate to have the Jamaican maid come in....and start screaming...or praying for us..

(1) THE SHINING:

I don't know why of all horror movies this one really gave me the chills...instead of just shocks. It certainly wasn't Jack Nicholson...he just made me laugh.

Maybe it was the scene when the wife comes across the typewriter with the same sentence typed over and over again. That was pretty scary. Writer's block always is.

Or maybe it was this scene....



Wow. Still as spooky as when I first saw it.

And the little tricycle does remind me of another REALLY scary story I read the other day....about a guy who loved his bike too much.

Now that's TERRIFYING.

Although that does give me an idea.

Guess what I'm going to give that old homophobe Aaron Unruh for Christmas this year?

Happy Halloween everyone!!

The Dalai Lama and Harper's Hidden Agenda

OK....anyone care to guess the REAL reason Great Fat Leader held this ridiculous photo op with the Dalai Lama today?

(1) STEPHEN HARPER IS A HUMAN RIGHTS CHAMPION?

Er...no. Just ask the brutal human rights abusers of Colombia.

In a thinly veiled slap at U.S. congressional Democrats who oppose a trade deal with Colombia until the country's rights record improves, Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper used a trip to Bogota to present himself as a steadier ally.

"We are not going to say fix all your social, political and human rights problems and only then will we engage in trade relations with you. That's a ridiculous position,"

Or dig up the rotting remains of the Court Challenges Program. The one that was designed to protect the human rights of CANADIANS.

(2) STEPHEN HARPER TRIES TO DO EVERYTHING GEORGE BUSH DOES?

Hmmm...yes...but in this case....believe it or not..... it's MORE than just another Chimpy blowjob.

(3) STEPHEN HARPER THINKS CHINA NEEDS CANADA MORE THAN CANADA NEEDS CHINA.

Gawd...I hope not. I LOVE living in one of the richest countries on earth.

(4) STEPHEN HARPER IS A SECRET BUDDHIST.

Wrong. Great Fat Leader is a secret born again CHRISTIAN fanatic...who belongs to a weird sect that believes that daddy knows best ...gays are an abomination....America is beautiful....and the world could end TOMORROW.

Give up?

OK. Here's another clue....

Why do you think Stephen Harper announced his insane War on Drugs at a SALVATION ARMY office in Winnipeg?

And why do you think he appointed JAKE EPP...the head of a Christian College and a notorious homophobe....

"What is needed is not protection for homosexuals, but for Canadians who are not deviant."

To of all things the rigged panel on Afghanistan.... on the eve of an election?

OK.....if you don't get it now you never will...so here's the answer.

Stephen Harper is trying to mobilize his demoralized religious wingnut base...by sending out coded messages that if they help him get a majority, religion will be BACK....with a vengeance.

But of course he has to be discreet. Because now he's a MODERATE....and has no HIDDEN AGENDA. Right?

So Jason Kenney, his ambassador to the wingnut court, has been very busy secretly promising religious groups a glorious New Day in Canada. From a Defence of Religion Act ..... to a promise that faith-based agencies will get the lion's share of government subsidized charity work.

So they can make life hell for gay kids in our schools . And shove crazy religion down the throats of poor Canadians along with their supper.

The bottom line:

If you love freedom...and you believe that religion should stay in churches and temples and OUT of public life.

And if you love Canada and our precious Canadian values. You better be ready to fight for them...and soon.

Because crazy religion is coming our way...

Crazy Religion and the End of the World

A few questions on a fall afternoon...

If we know where this bomb is going?

The US Department of Defence has asked for an additional $88 million to modify B2 stealth bombers so that they can carry a 30,000lb bomb called the massive ordnance penetrator

And George Bush...who looks crazier every day....warns about the Third World War.

"if you're interested in avoiding World War III . . . you ought to be interested in preventing [Iran] from having the knowledge necessary to make a nuclear weapon."

But we KNOW he is the one who would start it.

And might even welcome it because he believes that Armageddon in the Middle East will lead to the return of "The Messiah."

Just like the equally crazy Ahmedinejad believes that Armageddon will bring back the "Hidden Imam."

Ahmadinejad has publicly declared that one of his missions is to hasten and prepare for the return of the Mahdi.The way to hasten Mahdi's return, Ahmadinejad believes, is to hasten Armageddon.

And meanwhile at the Vatican....a former Nazi Pope beatifies 498 priests who were killed during the Spanish Civil War.

The Vatican staged its largest mass beatification ceremony ever yesterday, putting 498 victims of religious persecution before and during Spain's civil war on the path to possible sainthood.

Tens of thousands attended the ceremony, which drew criticism from some in Spain who saw it as implicit criticism of the Socialist government as it takes a critical look at the country's civil war past and the fascist dictatorship of General Francisco Franco.

But doesn't apologize for the horror his fascist side caused.

And here at home one of Bennie's beastly bishops bans James Loney from addressing a conference on social justice?

Not because he is gay....but because he has a partner.

"I asked if it was because I was gay, and the answer was, 'No, it's because you are in a relationship with man...."

And all over the world people attack others and blow themselves up to please their primitive bloodthirsty gods.

Why are we celebrating ANY kind of religion?

When its monstrous sicko craziness is threatening to destroy us all...

Is Now the Time for Stephane Dion to Quit?

I suppose it finally had to happen. After weeks of denial....and searching for the pony in the horseshit...the awful truth about Stephane Dion seems to be settling in.

Now I know that Dion isn't the only reason the Liberals are sinking.

But I agree with Gordon Gibson when he says what EVERYONE knows...that Dion is now the BIGGEST problem.

What is this "one serious problem"? It is simply this: Stéphane Dion is the least effective Liberal leader, no contest, for at least 100 years.

Not because Dion isn't a decent and smart man. But because he's such a lousy politician.

If I needed any more proof of that...and I don't....a recent interview with Daniel Lessard, French Canada's Don Newman, only reminded me of just how lousy he really is.

Dion had managed to hold his own quite nicely for most of the interview...by linking Stephen Harper to George Bush whenever he could. Until the very last question.

Lessard asked him about Jean Chretien's book and his statement that Quebecers wouldn't have been able to separate if the YES side had won the referendum by only a small margin.

Dion should have replied by saying that if Quebecers had really wanted to separate nobody would have been able to hold them back. But that was ANCIENT history...time had moved on. And so had he. Quebecers had now been officially recognized as a nation he was PROUD to belong to. And he was just focused on doing what he could do to make the story of the Great French Nation in North America even MORE amazing...blah blah blah...

Instead he put on his wacky professor and Captain Canada hat and went on and on about how you couldn't destroy a country with those kind of numbers...and how the courts had upheld this and that. I believe he mumbled something about the Balkans at one point.... and blah blah blah. Reminding Quebecers why they HATE him so much, and blowing any brownie points he may have scored before.

So yes...I do agree that Dion is absolutely hopeless. And that he HAS to go. I just don't agree with Gibson on the question of when and how.

Especially not this how...

So, the easiest way to get rid of Mr. Dion as leader is have him lose an election. No problem, no blood on any Liberal hands and the voters are supreme. Only a few dozen remaining Liberal seats after that wipeout, you say? Proves the point. At least rebuilding could then begin.

Only an old wanker could suggest that deliberately losing an election...and giving Stephen Harper a mandate to destroy this country...is ok if it saves the Liberal Party... by destroying it first. Huh?

As for the timing ......I believe the time is NOW.

Dion should resign as soon as possible and the Deputy Leader Ignatieff should take over and lead the Liberals into the next election.

With the agreement that AFTER the election there would be a full leadership review and if necessary a new leadership contest.

Remember I'm not a Liberal or an Ignatieff supporter either. But his arrival at such a dramatic moment would electrify the Liberals and other Canadians...just like the arrival of Lucien Bouchard re-energized the YES side during the last Quebec referendum.

Harper's plans for a quick blitzkrieg would be stymied as he paused to figure out the shifting ground. His whole campaign strategy aimed at Dion would have to be completely revamped.

The only thing he could hope for would be another minority government....and that would just KILL him.

It would of course be a bitter pill for a man like Stephane Dion to swallow.













He'd have to admit defeat. And he is far too proud to be pushed out. So he'd have to make the big decision and choose between his sinking political career and his country.

Be brutally honest with himself and tell Canadians that he tried his best.. but he FAILED. That he finally realized that just having good ideas in politics isn't the same as being a good politician....and being able to communicate them to people.

How he'd like to have a chance to change all that. But he can't afford to take that chance because Stephen Harper is such a menace to Canada that the country can't risk failure.

So he's going to ask others to try to deliver the message that he couldn't because saving Canada is all that counts ...and that's all he ever wanted to do...blah blah blah...

It would be so painful and so hard for Dion I'm not optimistic he could ever bring himself to do that. And I would feel sorry for him. But if he really wants to be remembered as a real Captain Canada.

Instead of the loser who dragged his country down with him.

Now is his big chance....

J.K. Rowling, Dumbledore, and the Gay Fool

I've been trying to avoid the ridiculous tempest in a broom closet caused by J.K. Rowling's outing of this old wizard. But as I was racing up Yonge Street this morning... to buy a part for my computer.... who did I come across but J.K. herself!!!

Ok ok .....I didn't actually SEE her...just gazillions of her little fans...filing into an old theatre where the billionaire writer was going to read from her latest book.

Which is just as well because if I had come face to face with her I would have had to admit that I haven't read ANY of her books. And I've only seen ONE of the Harry Potter films and it was.....um.....ok.

But seriously...if I HAD bumped into her I would have thanked her for getting kids to stop texting so much and actually read books again.

And for making a gay person part of her fantasy world....just like they are part of the real world. Because if the inclusion of ONE gay character in a story can cause such a fuss we've obviously got a PROBLEM.

I also would have offered J.K. my hearty congratulations for whipping up the religious wingnuts.

At last the author, a Ms. J.K. Rowling, revealed the revolting truth: Dumbledore is a gay homosexual who doesn’t deserve to live on G-d’s green earth. Not only was Rowling obviously pushing Satan’s agenda, she was pushing the homosexual agenda as well.

So they could expose their dirty parts in public again....and show everyone what sicko homophobes they really are.

And oh yes....I also would have told J.K. to ignore this gay fool.

We can only conclude that Dumbledore saw his homosexuality as shameful and inappropriate to mention among his colleagues and students. His silence suggests a lack of personal integrity that is completely out of character.

Like a lisping weakling, Dumbledore is a painfully selfless, celibate, dead gay man, so forgive me if I don't see Rowling's revelation as great progress.

Oh really? Or ....as we say in Gay....PUH - LEAZE.

First of all what DID he expect the old headmaster to tell his students....that Grindelwald was his gay lover....but he turned into a Nazi....so he had to kill him?

Wouldn't that be a little.....um...... disturbing? For kids.

And secondly does he really suggest that since the old wizard doesn't live up to his view of a gay character....we're better off having no gay character at all?

Yup.

We are now all free to imagine a gay life more whole and fulfilling than the one Rowling gave Dumbledore. But it would have been better if she had just left the old girl to rest in peace.

Hmmm.... or maybe it would be EVEN better if the fool got a life...and gave his hysterical wankery a rest.

The fact is the whole silly controversy WILL give parents a new way to introduce the notion of homosexuality to their children. Not in the absurd way the gay fool thinks they should. But in a gentle way made for kids.

Something like this...

Dumbledore and Grindelwald were great friends and loved each other....just like mummy and daddy are great friends and love each other.

Period.

Because teaching tolerance to children is one of the greatest things you can do for them.

J.K. Rowling just made that a little easier.

Good for her...

Seven Thousand Lashes for Being Gay

Of all the barbarous Islamofascist regimes in the Middle East I think I hate the one in Saudi Arabia more than any other.

The 9/11 hijackers were mostly Saudis...as is of course Osama Bin Laden.

The crazy Wahhabi fanatics that they give billions to are responsible for producing suicide bombers all over the world.

The crown princes send money to Sunni insurgents in Iraq to kill Shiites and American soldiers.

But nobody does anything but kiss their royal asses ....because of course they've got oil.

So their kingdom remains a corrupt and brutal place....where women are treated like farm animals....the religious police act like the Gestapo....people are routinely tortured or beheaded in the street.












And outrages like this one are allowed to happen.

The floggings began on Tuesday. The men were dragged into the square, their shirts removed and they where whipped. They were then returned to prison. The process was repeated on Wednesday and will continue daily until all 7,000 lashes have been administered.

Shari'a law, as interpreted and enforced in Saudi Arabia, allows sentences ranging from imprisonment and flogging to death for “deviant sexual behaviour.”

There have been some small protests.

But what good will they do as long as the West continues to kiss their asses because they've got oil....and we're such oil junkies?

You know I think I can quite truthfully say that the day those barbaric religious fanatics are smoked.

And the corrupt rulers of that anti-semitic and homophobic terrorist kingdom end up hanging from lamp posts.

Will be one of the happiest days of my life...

General Hillier's Secret Mission to Change Canada

I see that General Blow Hard has arrived in Kandahar on a surprise visit. Just to "visit his soldiers." Right.

And of course it has NOTHING to do with the Throne Speech where Prime Minister Chickenhawk vowed to keep us in Afghanistan until 2011. But he'll meet with the media later. You KNOW he will.

Just like you know I hate this war in Afghanistan for a whole bunch of reasons....not the least of which is having to argue with some of my best friends all the time... trying to convince them that the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

I hate it because the NATO mission doesn't have enough soldiers or resources to carry out the mission. And never will.

I hate it because the conflict been turned into a white hat/ black turban cartoon of a war when the reality is far more complex.

In academic circles, the biggest issue now is: `Are we shooting the right guys?' It stems from the realization that the Taliban is a motley bunch that shifts like a virus and is riddled with seams," said van Kappen, a senior analyst with the Hague Centre for Strategic Studies.

What the Dutch are finding in Uruzgan is that there are many groups who have joined the Taliban for all kinds of reasons – business interests, family reasons, tribal conflicts, smuggling, drugs – layers and layers of factors far too complex for us to ever truly understand.

I hate it because it has made ALL of our political parties look bad. The Stephen Harper Party wants to use it to please George Bush....and to pump up cheap patriotism to win themselves votes.The Liberals want to try to suck and blow at the same time. And the NDP wants us to break our promise to stay there until 2009.

I hate it because these hacks rigged the Afghanistan Study Group...even though the real lives of our soldiers are at stake.

I hate it because it has turned most of our national media into nothing more than pathetic cheerleaders.

But I think that even more than ALL of that I hate Blow Hard Hillier....the most yankee worshipping General we've ever had....for using the the war in Afghanistan...for political purposes.












By setting up Operation Connection. Which masquerades as a recruiting operation. But is really an attempt to change our whole Canadian culture into a more warlike one. And make our military just another cog in the crazy Pentagon war machine.

As Brian Stewart of the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation reports in this video...Operation Connection is nothing more than a giant propaganda exercise.

I know it's 17 minutes long...but unless you watch it you won't know what's really going on...or understand why General Blow Hard turned up in Kandahar so soon after the Throne Speech.

Hint...hint....it's all about a suitable backdrop.

You know I hate arguing with my friends over Afghanistan because I know their intentions are noble...and their hearts are in the right place.

But if they can't see how Rick Hillier is using the war and the lives of our troops to try to change our country...by acting more like a politician than a General...then they must have blinkers on.

And if they don't see how THAT threatens our democratic system AND our sovereignty. Then nothing I will ever say will ever change their minds.

And they'll wake up one day in a country they won't recognize...

Lucky Dube: Death of a Reggae Hero

When the call came in from London early this morning I couldn't believe it. And then when I did I was so sad and so angry. Some miserable criminal bastards had murdered Lucky Dube

How COULD they?

Even more than the great Bob Marley, Lucky Dube (Doo-Bay) was my greatest reggae hero. I loved his songs from the first time I heard them. And when I finally had a chance to go to one of his concerts it was MAGICAL.

Lucky, his band, the backup singers and the Zulu dancers were absolutely fantastic. I got really close to the stage and tried.... as best as a klutzy white boy could.... to dance like them. Lucky looked down at me and smiled. It was the BEST reggae show I ever went to.

Lucky had so many great songs...from his anti-apartheid anthems like Prisoner, Slave, and House of Exile...to other more spiritual and joyful ones like Jah Live, Feel Irie, Reggae Strong. And so many others.

Unfortunately there aren't that many videos to choose from. But because he stood for resistance, freedom, love and a better world for EVERYONE....and his story was South Africa's story too.

I thought I'd play this one first...



You know...if my greatest living hero Nelson Mandela is the freedom heart of South Africa...for me Lucky Dube was its freedom singing voice.

The people of that beautiful country overcame the horror of Apartheid. Now they must deal with its ugly scars and stop killing each other.

Lucky, a soft spoken gentle man who never uttered a hateful word, tried to speak out against that crazy violence. But in the end it consumed him.

The only thing that consoles me now is that I KNOW that he will always be remembered... and his music will never die. Because he was a good man and a great artist.

And because you can kill the man, but you can't kill his music.

Like this song called Remember Me...



Oh brother. We WILL remember,

You and your beautiful freedom music WILL live forever.

But tonight I'm just so sad...

Sex, Rednecks and Burritos:Who Googles What?

Ever since I discovered that I had a lot of readers abroad I've been tormented by one burning question. How did that faithful reader in Mongolia hear about my blog? How did he or she FIND me?

And am I really THAT famous?

So I decided to check out how visitors get to my site..... and when I looked at some of the search keywords tonight ...I have to admit I was shocked....

Multiple blow jobs...Pig fuck man photo ...Saskatchewan rednecks.....Enema ...Iraqi fuck American.....Gay sex signals in public toilets....

Golly. If only I had known there was such a demand for rednecks, sex signals, and enemas, I would have written so much MORE about them.

Although I was also a bit annoyed....I mean how many times have I got to tell that pervert in Saudi Arabia that while I do write about PIG FUCKS....and MAN...and PHOTO... I NEVER write about them all together. So don't get your hopes up. Sorry.

But then I saw this Google survey and I felt a lot better.

Isn't it comforting to know that the Taliban are still at the top of the Google Charts.... in Pakistan? Who knew?

Or that Chileans are fascinated with gays AND Nazis?

And that David Beckham is still number one.... in Venezuela.

As for Canada... isn't it GREAT to think this one might actually fool the world into thinking we're still cool.

"Marijuana" - Canada, United States, Australia

Although how do we ever apologize for this one?

"Tom Cruise" - Canada, United States, Australia

WTF is that car bomb and burrito thing?

"Burrito" - United States, Argentina, Canada

And what does it say about us? Gulp. That we're more and more American every day? Or just that after all that marijuana we'll eat ANYTHING..

But then so will Stephen Harper...




















Holy Madunga!!!! Is that a LEADER or a Blue Burrito?

But of course it doesn't really matter. The Internet is not moralistic or sentimental. The challenge as a blogger is how to make this raw data WORK for you.

So I just want to let my faithful readers know that I am going to do my absolute darnedest to satisfy the demand out there. By trying to include multiple blow jobs,Saskatchewan rednecks, enemas, Tom Cruise, marijuana , car bombs AND burritos in EVERY post.

The only question I have now is when I include Stephen Harper on that list where will I put him? Between rednecks and blow jobs....

Or burritos and enemas?

Oh boy...that's going to be a HARD one..

----------------------------------------------------------

UPDATE:

Ooops. I just had another idea. Maybe all those Burrito seekers were just a bunch of old hippies looking for these guys....




They say the sixties died that day at Altamont. When the Hells Angels killed a man. Isn't that spooky?

I wonder how long we'll have to wait for The Day the Blue Burrito Killed Canada.

Won't THAT make a great YouTube?

The Throne Speech: Is it Time to Leave Canada?

I wanted to write about the Throne Speech today. But I just couldn't.

Life is too short. The weather in Canada is gloomy enough. And the possibility that I could soon be living in a fascist country is enough to depress ANYONE.

Besides I thought Chet summed it up well.

All I would add to that is a little advice for the Liberals: Don't fall into Harper's trap.

Retreat when you have to retreat. Pick the right moment to strike. Let Great Fat Leader get more and more frustrated and crazy...until he's foaming at the mouth.

And people start asking themselves the obvious question: Why does this yankee ass licking bully tyrant want a majority so BADLY?














And then hit him with all you have.

Oh yes...and when he presents his fascist law and order bills ask him why a Big Fat Crime Fighter would scrap the gun registry that police consult about 3,000 times a day to try to stop people from killing THEM.

Aren't our cops TOPS?

Does he REALLY want to turn our country into this one?


One for each side of the bed?

Why Great Fat Leader? Why?

But of course this pathetic yankee stooge wants to change Canada beyond recognition. And if he gets a majority that's exactly what he will do.

Saddle us with a quasi-totalitarian nightmare where women, poor people, gays and lesbians, natives and others will be treated like second class citizens. Religious fanatics will run amok. Bullied gay kids won't stand a chance.

And our country will be hollowed out and turned into a pathetic Mini Me Amerika.

I hope the Liberals and others understand that, and can stop their idiotic bickering and put Canada first.

And I'm certainly preparing to do my part.

But just in case the unthinkable happens...because these days you never know... I'm also planning to move.

Remember how I told you the other day that I had an island?

Well I really do.














Yup. Canada under a fascist government might be exciting...for a while.

And I am trying to keep things in some kind of perspective.

But if Canadians are dum enough to hand a fascist pig like Harper a majority...when they weep about it later....all I'll have to say to them is you DESERVE it.

And isn't life a beach?

The Flaming Pope and the Priestly Pervert

You know when I read the story about the flaming Pope in Poland I thought it was crazy enough.

From Mother Theresa in a cinammon bun, to the Virgin Mary on a toasted cheese sandwich - images resembling religious icons are regularly spotted in unlikely places.

Now this fiery figure - photographed in a bonfire in Poland - is being hailed as Pope John Paul II making an appearance from beyond the grave.

But then I took another look at the picture and I thought it was even NUTTIER. I mean EVERYONE knows that there aren't any flames in heaven...only in hell. So WTF are those ignorant Polski peasants yapping about ?

If that's the Pope in the Bonfire he's only out because his Satanic Majesty gave him a day pass.

And that's not something to CELEBRATE. Or is it?

Besides don't these dummies know that if you want to see a flaming Pope you have to go to Rome?















Isn't that as OBVIOUS as this story?

Oh not the fact that the alleged pervert is a Canadian. That's shocking and disgusting...and will shame us in the eyes of the world.

But this part....

The lead suspect in an international pedophile investigation volunteered at a B.C. school and was a chaplain with the air cadets in Nova Scotia.

The volunteer work was part of his training at Christ of the King seminary, where Neil was studying to become a priest.

Praise the Lord. And pass the straitjackets and the handcuffs.

Crazy religion working to make the world a crazier and more dangerous place.

Look ...here's my bottom line.

Let them see the Pope in a Pepperoni Pizza. Or Mary in a Mama Burger.

Or Jesus on a fish stick....or a dental X-ray .... or in a nacho pan ....or EVERYWHERE.


Holy Madunga indeed.

Let them live in their crazy world.

Just keep them away from the children...

Ann Coulter and the Christian Clowns

I see the crazy Christian, right-wing bitch goddess, and Nazi Republican hooker Ann Coulter continues to burn up the internet.

With some of the shit storm trenchant.

Is this a chicken-and-egg thing? because does she get a lot of media attention because we give it to her or does she say things so she'll get the media attention? At some point, why don't shows just not book her?

And some of it.....blunt.

Yikes!! I could never write anything like that. But then as I told you the other day, I'm staying out of it. I've run out of insults.

As a gay boy all I can do now is to try to stop staring at that shemale's boyish buns....




















So Sébastien doesn't whup me for having impure thoughts like this guy.

But of course none of this has stopped the diseased religious fanatics from claiming she's just a good Christian.

Newsflash for secular humanists who adhere to the credo of relativism: Christians worth their salt believe they have the one true religion and the greatest happiness both in this world and in the next comes with accepting the Truth, and living it.

Newsflash for religious fanatics...shove your phony salty "Truth" up your OWN asses . And instead of telling others to perfect themselves. Why don't you spend a little more time trying to perfect YOURSELVES?

“I only pretended I was gay to study how priests are seduced,” said Mgr Stenico, a frequent guest on television programmes discussing religious issues. “There are people who go after them . . . I really believe there is a diabolical plan by groups of Satanists.”

In the Vatican?

Wait. Make that a LOT of time.

An Illinois man who worked as a "Christian clown" named Klutzo was arrested yesterday on child pornography charges for allegedly taking naked photographs of young boys at a Philippines orphanage.

He also reported being an ordained minister who has been involved in pastoral ministry, Christian education and camping, and evangelism since 1967.

Uh oh...not Christian camping...

And didn't you just LOVE the video of Klutzo in the House of Boy....I mean Joy? And the catchy tune?

"If anybody looks at me let them see Jesus."

And this delicious titbit....or dickbit:

"In one Internet posting on a missionary outreach site, Carlock sought to volunteer at an overseas orphanage "doing any tasks that I am capable of doing. Wife cannot come due to work."

Surprise. Surprise. Geezus in a tortilla..... you gotta hand it to these crazy right wingers and religious fanatics.

They may be hypocrites, homophobes, Nazis, and perverts.

But they sure are HILARIOUS...













Muah. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha....

The Search for Life in Outer Space Gets Serious

For years I've been using a crude but powerful transmitter to beam a signal into outer space...demanding to know who the hell was responsible for sending me to Planet Earth. And what the fuck are they waiting for to RESCUE me????

But I never expected to hear from them. Until now.

The Allen Telescope Array will be like 200 million Jodie Fosters sitting out there listening...We don't know how many needles are in the galactic haystack of 400 billion stars, but I think we will find (signals from intelligent civilizations) by 2025....

Two hundred MILLION Jodie Fosters listening for aliens?

That'll drive the crazy guy from Taxi Driver even crazier. Are you LISTENING to ME? Are you LISTENING to ME?

And what WILL we do if we find them?

The good news is we have a PLAN....

No response to a signal or other evidence of extraterrestrial intelligence should be sent until appropriate international consultations have taken place. The procedures for such consultations will be the subject of a separate agreement, declaration or arrangement.

The bad news is the discovery that we're not alone could cause humans to act even MORE like humans.

Reactions to a detection (or non-detection) can range from indifference through mild positive or negative curiosity, through millennial enthusiasm or catastrophist anxiety, to full scale pronoia or paranoia....A few reactions would probably be irrationally extreme or even violent.

OMFG...not full scale PRONOIA...which reminds me..... what if the aliens are just like us? Only CRAZIER.

Will we really have to send Bruce Willis after them? Or will THEY come after us?

Uh oh....I think I'm going to be sending out a new message along with my please call Earth one. Something like this...

Dear Cosmic Neighbours.

My name is Simon and I live on Planet Earth where I was sent by the civilized galaxy of Gayzonia to study the primitive creatures (humans) who live here. It was a horrible mistake needless to say.... And I'm afraid I've got some really BAD news to pass on. Not only are these humans extremely violent and completely crazy.They're LOOKING for you!!!!

The good news is that since I come from the so-called rainbow galaxy I'm different. I'm friendly. I'm open to new experiences ....and I don't care how green or how blobby you are.

So if you do decide to invade Earth I'd be HAPPY to be your tour guide. I'll explain everything. I'll show you all the neat places...and point out all the people you absolutely HAVE to kill...or ZAP with your ray guns.

And all I ask is that when you have finished torching this miserable planet, that you drop me off at my civilized little galaxy on the way home.

Oh yes....and that you take this nasty alien with you as well...

















And just dump him ANYWHERE.

Or EAT him.

Because this monster came from some crazy evil neocon planet . And he's REALLY dangerous.

Your ONLY friend on Earth

Simon

You know if Stephen Harper DOES get a majority I won't be the only Canadian looking up at the sky praying for deliverance.

We all will.

As for the aliens out there....do you think it would help if I sent them this video as well?



No. I didn't think so either.

Oh boy.....we better hope there's NOBODY out there.

Have a great weekend everyone!!!

Ann Coulter and the Poop in the Pool

I see the right-wing shemale bitch goddess Ann Coulter is back on the street peddling her skanky wares.

Good Lord....or Heil Hitler. What are we going to do with that nymphomaniacal Nazi hooker? First she tries to fuck the left. Then she started hanging out with the gay porn star Matt Sanchez.

Now she's fucking herself.

Clearly, Ann Coulter needs a wake-up call about the power of words to injure others and fuel hatred. She needs an education, too, about the roots of anti-Semitism.

It is fair to say that the rails leading to Auschwitz were greased by precisely the opinion Coulter expressed on American television this week.

She got away with insulting gays, or calling for Muslims to be deported. But she won't get away with that.

Just don't tell her faithful groupies....because they're still kissing her ass.

But then he would. You know with all that jebesus spouting gibberish it's scary enough to think he's a doctor. But if the Royster loses any more I.Q. points we're going to have to water him like a geranium. Or flush him like a turd.

As for me I've written so much about Ann Coulter I must confess I've run out of insults. I mean after skanky homophobe nazi hooker what more can you say about her?

So I thought I'd let Henry Rollins just say it for me....again..



Hmmm....you know that was EXCELLENT. But a bit too intellectual.

I mean you can't expect Dr Roy and The Nazi Hooker's Fan Club to understand some of those fancy words.

So I think I'm going to have to explain to those conservatards just how much trouble their bitch goddess is in.

By using a simpler....and cruder example...



You know seeing the skanky nazi homophobe hooker drowning in a pool of her own bile would be REALLY great.

But seeing her drown in a pool of her own shit ....while her shrinking band of pathetic right-wing groupies suck and blow like carp.

Will be even MORE enjoyable....

Turning a Torture Centre into a Memorial

It's a beautiful white building. But if its walls could talk they would scream. Or just run with blood.

It's the Argentine Navy's Mechanic School. For years it was brutal torture centre and death factory.

Now it's going to be a memorial museum.

An estimated 5,000 people are thought to have been tortured and killed there in the late 1970s to early 1980s.

Most were tortured and never emerged alive, their bodies dumped from planes into the nearby River Plate.

If that were not grim enough, the building also served as a maternity centre where babies were taken from their mothers and given to childless police and military couples.

The mothers were then usually killed.

I wonder if any of those poor people ever imagined that the building where they were so brutally tortured and then murdered would one day become a memorial to them.

And not just to them but to the 30,000 or more people who were murdered during Argentina's Dirty War.

I'm glad some of those dirty bastards are being punished And the Nazi crimes of the Catholic Church continue to be exposed.

I'm glad Argentinians are going to have a place to remember all those who disappeared into the fascist killing machine..... leaving only the memories of those who loved them ....and those black and white photographs to stare at us and horrify us forever.

I'd like to think that if I ever visit Argentina again that's the first place I'd visit.

But after that afternoon in that musky crypt in that leafy cemetery, I honestly don't know if I could.

You see I HAVE to believe that humanity learned something from the Holocaust. That we're better than that now. That it could never happen again.

But in a place like that you can't....