Sunday, January 20, 2013

Hockey Night in Harperland



A couple of my friends came over this evening to watch the Habs-Leafs game on my big screen TV. 

And they were surprised to find out that I hadn't been planning to watch it, until they turned up.

And that I wasn't the least bit excited that the season had finally started.

So I had to explain to them that no, my indifference had nothing to do with the strike, or all those calls to boycott the NHL, which I always knew were bullshit.













Because I know my people eh?

And the reasons my love affair with NHL hockey has cooled, are far more rational:

(1) I don't like the professional game anymore. I find it too ugly and violent. I refuse to pay to watch thugs do to others, what in any other place would get them arrested...
















So until the National Concussion League tightens the rules, punishes the guilty, and enlarges the rinks so the good players have a chance to get away from the goons, I won't be going back.

(2) I don't watch the games on TV because I don't have RDS here, so I would have to watch the CBC and risk being exposed to this monstrous redneck...














And his reactionary views on EVERYTHING.

(3) I hate the way Stephen Harper has wrapped himself up in the national sport, and fooled people into thinking he's a real hockey fan...

















When he's just a poseur, and Hockey Night in Harperland is nothing but a horror show.

And lastly, but not leastly, in a different Canada, if you were a proud Québécois like I am, and a proud Montrealer, being a Canadiens fan was practically a sacred thing.

But times change.

Sacrament !#@!!

And that was long ago...



But I will say this, I'm still hoping for about ten REALLY cold days. 

So the canal or the lake can freeze over.

And we can play hockey like it's supposed to be played...














(click pic to enlarge)

Because when it's played like that...

And here comes Simon, he SHOOTS !!!! He misses. He falls flat on his face.

I can almost forget that I live in Harperland eh?

And it's still our game...

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10 comments:

Fightfordemocracy said...

What a concept! Playing hockey instead of watching so-called experts play hockey. Go, Simon, go!

Anonymous said...

You really have small world view, don't you Simon? Everything is about Quebec or Harper with you. I hope you don't rant about him all the time in real life, cus that would be just sad.

As for hockey, I could care less what does or doesn't happen with the NHL. Means nothing.

Cathie from Canada said...

Car!
We've had too much snow for the kids to play on the street so far this year, but I expect we will hear the "car!" cry again before the winter is out.
Actually, I'm glad that hockey is back, in spite of all this stuff.
Love "The Sweater" and glad you posted it.

Steve said...

I want Justin to say " Olympic sized ice is my solution to free Hockey from the grasp of Harperland and its allies. If Canada will have me, she will have a law stating games played for money must have the Olympic size even if Grapes calls it funny"

Anonymous said...

It was lockout not a strike, another attack on unions which I'm sure warmed Harpoon's cold darkk heart.

Simon said...

hi fightfordemocracy... thank you, and I have good news. It's really really cold out there and the canal is freezing nicely. It may be a shortened season but I'm ready !!!!! ;)

Simon said...

hi anonymous... OMG. This post is mostly about hockey, and includes a classic CANADIAN story "The Hockey Sweater" and you think it's all about Harper and Quebec? And no I don't rant about Harper to my friends. I let them rant about him instead because they are even harder on him than I am... ;)

P.S. Haven't you noticed how many Canadians hate Harper even more than I do? As I've told you before you really should get out more...

Simon said...

hi Cathie... yes I'm afraid it's going to be a shortened hockey season for all of us. My interest in NHL hockey may grow if the Habs get within shooting distance of a playoff spot. *sigh*
And yes, I've always thought "The Sweater" was one of our greatest Canadian stories...

Simon said...

hi Steve...wait, think that over again. If the Cons are on the ice I want the rink to be as SMALL as possible. I'm not the greatest skater, but I'm mean in the corners... ;)

Simon said...

hi anonymous...thanks for correcting me, people who hate unions are always making the same mistake, and I'm not one of them. I should also add that I completely supported the players, since they are the ones putting their brains on the line...