Thursday, July 23, 2009

What it Feels Like to Have the Swine Flu

Even as the Swine Flu spread faster than any pandemic ever has. And the ominous news kept on multiplying.

Or not multiplying enough.

It may take substantially longer to make the full amounts of swine flu vaccine countries have contracted to buy because efforts to improve the yield of the vaccine seed strains aren't bearing fruit, experts say.

The Swine Flu didn't scare me.

I figured that even if I did get it, the piggy bug would be just like any other flu. A good excuse to call in sick...and feel GOOD about it.

But that was until I read this story.

What’s a little dizziness compared with the thumping pain of a headache that made even the softest pillow feel like a rough stone; or a bit of ear-fuzz after a throat so inflamed that swallowing water felt like imbibing shards of glass?

By teatime, as I sat watching Dumbo with the children, I realised that I couldn’t really lift my head. Shooting pains were assailing my arms and chest, and the muscles in my legs were joining in. And I was hot, really hot. Except actually I was cold, really cold. Brrr, shivery cold. Or was I hot? I had absolutely no idea.

If I closed my eyes, I could definitely see pink elephants, though. Dancing ones, with psychedelic trombones . . .

Oh no. Not thumping pain, shards of glass, and psychedelic TROMBONES. Now I'm terrified.

I'm writing my will. Instructing my doctors to hit me with all the painkillers ...or smack they got.

Trying to decide what's scarier....dying a horrible death...or being paralysed?

A fully licensed vaccine against human swine flu may not be ready until the end of the year, months after a second wave of flu is expected to hit Canada in the fall...

That would leave Canada and other nations to decide whether to invoke emergency measures and vaccinate people with only limited information about safety and dosing.

And of course trying to figure out whether I'd look like a genius or an IDIOT.

If I went to the movies dressed like this...

You know I can't shake the feeling that this piggy bug story is going to get bigger and bigger until it EATS all the others. Including any plans for a fall election. And maybe even the Olympics.

Damn. Who knew life could be so dangerous eh?

Enjoy it while you can...


  1. Anonymous10:05 PM

    ugh. i'm so divided on this one. some say it's a conspiracy to boost pharmacutical sales....others say it's real, ugly and well, just not nice.

    i have an essential oil called 'medieval' which is a combo of herbs that the doctors used to use during the plague so not to contract it. this way i figure if i rub some under my nose i'm being cautious but not feeding into the vaccine stuff.

    and no doubt it's a flu that was brought about by our lovely boys who engage in germ warfare. something like that.

    ew, yuck.

    oh ya, and let's not forget the hand sanitizers not being sent to the reservations cuz the almighty 'they' think it will be drunken.


  2. hey harper valley, what are those herbs? medevil ones.
    good comment!

  3. Montreal's Melissa Auf der Maur reports from her blog on her bout with this flu.

  4. Hi Scout...I guess what I'm trying to say to people is don't panic, but don't take it lightly either.
    The usual precautions are usually enough.
    As for the vaccine I don't know what to say because it's always a bit of a crap shoot, and this year some of us will be getting TWO. The one for the seasonal flu as well, which complicates things since we don't really know how the two will interact.
    As for that nonsense about the hand sanitizers when I heard that I practically exploded. You know me... :) Since native people are particularly vulnerable they need the absolute BEST care...

  5. Hi Oemissions...yes I read Melissa's account too. It didn't seem too bad...until I read the one I included in my post. I was feeling pretty cocky up to that point.
    Now I hear they've invented a device that they detects the presence of flu virus in the AIR.
    They're planning to use it in places like airports. But I want one too !!!! :)

  6. man, this swine flu thing is getting pretty messed up. people are freaking out about it..the only thing im afraid of is slow deaths... from like radiation but i just hope i dont get it so i can still live my fun life =D.

  7. hi Shaman...don't worry about it. We have many more weapons to fight it than we had during the pandemic of 1918. The best thing any of us can do is just wash our hands frequently, cough and sneeze into our sleeves, and stay at home if we do become ill.
    And oh yeah....keep our fingers crossed... ;)