Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Donald Trump's Sad But Predictable Inauguration Problems

Donald Trump is less than a month away from being sworn in as president and moving into the White House, but he is reportedly not happy.

His Thank You Tour is over, he can no longer bathe in the adulation of his fanatical supporters, which he loves to do sooooo much.

He is still fuming over Vanity Fair's brutal review of the Trump Tower Grill. And hoping they don't review this one.

And to make matters worse his boys are already in trouble, after trying and failing to auction off their sister, and then organizing a very expensive hunting expedition.

For the day after the inauguration...

Which had Big Daddy and his organization running for cover, like the wild animals of the world do when they see his savage sons coming. 

Practically denying the boys are part of the The Family.

The Trump transition team released a statement Tuesday seeking to distance Eric Trump and Donald Trump Jr. from a fundraiser that offered a hunting trip with them — and a photo opportunity with the president-elect — to top donors.

“The Opening Day event and details that have been reported are merely initial concepts that have not been approved or pursued by the Trump family,” transition spokeswoman Hope Hicks said in a statement.

But while that's embarrassing, what must be really bothering Trump is his failure so far to get any well known artists to perform at his inauguration...

They're all turning him down, or bowing out in a hurry. 

Andrea Bocelli will not perform at President-elect Donald Trump’s inauguration, Page Six has exclusively learned — because of backlash over the gig. 

A source said that, by Monday, “Bocelli said there was no way he’d take the gig . . . he was ‘getting too much heat’ and he said no.”

So far the only acts his organization has been able to book is a 16-year-old named Jackie Evancho, an America's Got Talent starlet. And the old and dilapidated group the Kings of Chaos, who have spent much of their career performing in South and Central America. 

The Trumpites were said to be interested in getting country singer Brad Paisley to perform, if only so he could play his song Kung Pao Buckaroo Holiday, which is an assault on political correctness. And would have driven the neo-nazis wild.

Until they found out Paisley was an Obama supporter who once compared the GOP to the WWE.

Both Elton John and Garth Brooks have turned him down, and as you probably know his attempt to recruit Kanye West just a few days after West was released from a mental hospital, didn't end well...

For good reason. Coming so soon after Kanye told an audience if he had voted he would have voted for Trump, and they started to throw things at him.

And although there are rumours Trump might be able to get the USA Freedom Kids to sing and bounce for him again... 

Now that they have suddenly decided NOT to sue him. 

In August, the group filed suit against the Trump campaign, alleging they had been denied promised appearances at future rallies and the ability to sell their merchandise. But the group has apparently had a change of heart since Trump won the White House.

The fact is the Trump Inauguration Team (TIT) is pretty close to scraping the bottom of the barrel.

So don't be surprised if they are forced to ask Victoria Jackson, the right-wing comedian to perform.

Because she may be washed up, but at least she would be singing from Trump's song book...

Or maybe not. 

Gawd. I played that song on the porch last night, and all the raccoons in the neighbourhood started to howl.

So maybe if they want to give that inauguration some real star power, they'll just have to get Trump to put on a colourful costume and perform himself...

But one thing is for sure. When a country's artists don't want to perform for their president, there's something wrong with that president.

Trump is being delegitimized before he even takes office.

His will be both the worst AND the tackiest government the U.S. has ever seen.

And I very much doubt he will last his full term, before he's given the hook...


  1. Anonymous11:40 AM

    Watch Simon, the inauguration will be YUGE! Who needs snowflakes like Seeger and Springsteen when you've got the NUGE on side! "Well, I make the pussy purr with the stroke of my hand / They know they gettin' it from me..."

    But I expect the pièce de résistance will be the Leningrad Cowboys with the Red Army Choir singing "Sweet Home Alabama." Look at that hair, they even look like the Donald! That'll bring down the House fer sure.

    1. hi anon...You mean it will be YUUUUUUUUUUUGE !!! I've read that Trump is planning a parade through New York City, and then ride in a helicopter to descend near the Capitol building and be greeted by his faithful supporters like the Messiah himself. And thanks for that video. I love the song Sweet Home Alabama, and I normally love the Red Army Choir. But good lord what was that? Hire them immediately !!! ;)

  2. Anonymous12:07 PM

    It's certainly a good sign that the broader arts community want nothing to do with him. He's reminding me a little of Commodus from Gladiator: desperate for the approval of the crowd, but stymied by a much more beloved entertainer.

    And just as vaingloriously tacky.

    One of the podcasts I listen to (The Bob and Chez Show, highly recommended) refers to Don Jr. and Eric Trump as Uday and Qusay, and the more you know about the kind of people Uday and Qusay Hussein were, the comparisons are rather apt.

    1. hi anon...I hadn't thought of that, but the Trump boys are starting to resemble Saddam's sons. And since some are already comparing what is happening in the U.S. to the fall of the Roman Empire, with Trump channelling Nero, goodness knows what lies in store for us in 2017....

    2. Never mind Nero, he inherited the job.

      Augustus was the real despot and I don't think Trump is smart or patient enough to pull it off. More worrying is that he may cause enough chaos and disorder and violations of constitutional and customary behaviour that a strongman may ride to the 'rescue'.

      Just to scare me further, I was listening to the BBC program Hard Talk this morning and they had an interview with Margaret Atwood.

      She was saying that she did not really fear a dictatorship in Canada as we are too diverse--she seemed to think it would take 30% of the population. Then she pointed out, there appeared to be more than 30% of fundies, etc., in the USA who might support a despot (my wording) in the USA.

      Oh great!

    3. hi Jrkrideau...I also believe that Trump could cause the kind of chaos from which a strongman could emerge. His anti-Muslim policies alone could cause a flurry of terrorist attacks, and goodness knows what other problems his erratic policies could cause. I don't think anyone can imagine what kind of future awaits us...

  3. Simon, have you heard that Tom Arnold says he has recordings of some outtakes from "The Apprentice" that show Trump saying "every racist thing ever." Arnold says Trump also calls his own son a "retard."

    Arnold appears to be playing a tactical game - goading Trump into suing him with the intention of using the law suit to force disclosure of all outtakes from The Apprentice.

    1. hi Mound....I have read something about that, and to be honest I don't know if I can take any more. The Trump beast has shaken my faith in humanity. I hope the beast isn't calling his youngest son Barron a "retard" because from what I have observed the child may be suffering from some condition, possibly autism. But is at least the most human looking person in the entire Trump zoo. However, if Tom Arnold does manage to lure Trump into a legal trap, I would encourage it, because Americans need to know the truth about their new president. It's too late to save us from his presidency, but anything that saps his power has got to be good. Happy Holidays Mound....

    2. Trump the great Uniter, who would of guessed. Happy holidays to my two favourite bloggers

    3. Hi Willy...the way I see it, if Trump doesn't unite the left nothing ever will. That's the light at the end of the tunnel. Happy holidays to you and all your loved ones...

  4. Anonymous7:24 AM

    Call me crazy, but I think the temptation of a multimillion dollar contract to perform a few songs at the Trumpapalooza will cause a few of the A-list singers and bands to give in. The love of money...

    1. NOT when projected over life-time earnings. Pariahs also don't get invited to the "best" parties.

    2. hi anon...I agree with jrkrideau. The A-list celebrities, who are already wealthy, have their social standing to think about as well as their future earnings...

  5. Anonymous9:04 AM

    How do you figure he won't last his entire term? He will not be impeached by the GOP congress unless he starts getting in the way of privatizing social security and medicare. So literally he would be impeached for doing something decent.

    1. Leaving aside any impeachment aspect, just think about it for a moment. Trump has throughout his life been able to set his own terms on when and how he works and in what environment. Even in his worst bankruptcy periods he was insisting on being kept in the lifestyle he was accustomed to. The Presidency of the USA though is a job from which there is no escape, you are always on, and works you harder than just about any other job. Trump will either burn out fast, collapse, or act so unfit he will trigger his own removal, because he lacks the mental fortitude for the strains of this particular job, possibly the physical as well, as I DO NOT trust that medical report and the source of it that Trump used to "prove" his good health.

      That is if he actually intends of being President instead of just Mike Pence's beard, and giving that Trump is literally walking ego I rather doubt he will go that way, or at least for too long. I think Trump wanted all the trapping of the Presidency, all the "respect" but not the work that comes with it, and as the reality of that workload becomes more apparent to him after it starts coming directly to him once sworn into the Office we may see something truly drastic in terms of his actual ability to stay afloat in the job.

    2. hi anon...I think Scotian is right. I think that the pressure of the job will cause Trump to come apart at the seams, until even many in the GOP will want him replaced by Pence...

  6. Anonymous9:46 AM

    Perhaps someday they will make a rural sitcom about "The Trumps go to the White House" complete with Jethro, Elly May,and Lisa Douglas but for now it has all the makings of a tragic thriller complete with the dark humorless characters he has invited into the inner circle. Perhaps in his past business dealings he could control these types as it was all about money and following the code. Not so with humorless ideologues. A smart manipulator but a disaster when it comes to character reading.

    1. hi's funny but I also keep thinking of a gilded version of the Beverly Hillbillies. But right now it's more like a cross between the West Wing and the Bates Motel...

  7. Anonymous5:46 PM

    Hard to believe his "business" acquaintances in Chicago,Vegas, Atlantic City haven't offered up some top name acts to perform at the inauguration. Guess all that damn outsourcing must have hurt their business as well. Bring back the good old days!

    1. hi anon...I believe some of them have been putting pressure on their acts to perform, but I guess they don't have the clout or the muscle they once had...