Saturday, May 26, 2007

Great Fat Leader's Stupid Burger Poll

Uh oh...fasten your seatbelts...this country is heading for The Abyss faster than I thought. I mean what can you say about a place where the political story du jour is Great Fat Leader's Burger Poll?

Some bloggers have had fun.

But the whole premise is absurd. Of course some Canadians would rather meet the Prime Minister than a mere opposition leader. You could declare a baboon Prime Monkey and some of them would still line up to shake its paw...and kiss it's shiny ass.

The question everybody should be asking is why didn't MORE of them want to meat Great Fat Leader?

Answer: because the idea of getting too close to creepy Harper....and listen to him rave about why he NEEDS a majority, as blood red hamburger juice runs out of both sides of his mouth, carving gullies in his pancake makeup, and splattering all over his tie and too horrible to contemplate.

And because it could be DANGEROUS....

Judging from his latest or two hamburgers could make the difference between bloating....and exploding...

But of course this burger poll isn't really a poll. The numbers are irrelevant. The whole thing is just the latest campaign by the PMO....through its blogging instrument Stephen try to make Stephen Harper appear more human.

You know....a guy who eats burgers....has coffee and donuts at Tim Hortons...and takes his kids to hockey games.

Instead of a psychopathic automaton and crazed policy wonk....incapable of any kind of warmth or empathy...who would turn this country into a mini-me Amerika...and a sinister police state.

So now that he has blown his chance for an early election we can expect to see Great Fat Ridiculous Leader hopping like a bloated toad from one event to another all summer long. In an increasingly desperate attempt to make him look half human.

Will it work? Don't make me laugh.

A lot of Canadians may be idiots...after all they put him in office. But now that they've had a good look at him many of them won't be fooled again.

They now know that whatever Harper and his hidden agenda pretend to be...a creepy nerd is a creepy nerd.

And the only time he'll ever sizzle is when Canadians throw him onto the grill of history.

Sizzle. Bitch. Burn...


  1. Oh dear, Mr. Harper... have you called Jenny yet?

  2. Anonymous1:11 AM

    Don't get excited, you will be watching his fat ass for many years as Prime Minister.

  3. Don't think so, anon. Sooner rather than later, I'll be watching his fat ass waddle back into opposition where it belongs. Hope he doesn't need 2 chairs by then.