Sunday, May 27, 2007

Hogzilla and the Amazing Battle of Kruger Park

When I first heard that an 11-year-old had gunned down a humongous Hogzilla in the backwoods of Alabama at first I was elated. I thought the monstrous porker Dick Cheney had been involved in another hunting accident....and had followed Jerry Falwell to Hog Heaven.You have to admit the resemblance is striking.

But then I was disappointed.

A pig the size of a hatchback has been reported shot dead by an 11-year-old boy using a pistol.

And then disgusted....

Jamison, an accomplished hunter who killed his first deer at the age of five.....said that he shot the animal eight times with a .50calibre revolver and chased it for three hours through hilly woods before finishing it off with a point-blank shot..

I wondered who was more dangerous the pig or the kid. Or whether it was a hoax

"That's not a pig, it's a dinosaur. No way that's a naturally-occurring hog. That, or the kid is 2ft tall."

If the story is true, it's hard to know what's more worrying, a 9ft pig or an 11-year-old serial animal killer with a deadly aim.

I don't know but I suggest we send the kid to Baghdad mounted on a giant porker...or Cheney... and see if that works.

But seriously that's why I prefer to hunt animals with a camera...

Even if it's just the swan in our pond.

Or these fearsome invaders...

The B-52s of flying poopers. Or the Animal Farm version of that old neocon nightmare and hallucination: the single mother on welfare...

But if you want to see a really amazing animal story you should check out this incredible amateur video of a fight between a buffalo herd, a pride of lions, and two alligators at Kruger National Park in South Africa.

And don't may not look good for a while....but baby gets away alive...

Isn't that amazing? There's something noble about about those big dumb creatures fighting back even though they're scared out of their tiny minds. Isn't that a magic moment when the prey turn on the predators?

Aren't I lucky to live in peaceful civilized Canada?

Now all I've got to remember is that if Stephen Harper and his ReformCons ever get a majority government they'll turn this country into a jungle...

If Dick Cheney gets his way he'll turn the world into a battlefield A world of predators and prey.

And the sooner we bring down those Hogzillas the safer we'll all be...


  1. The kid with the gun is kinda scary, in a he’s going to grow up in this world and walk among us kind of way.

    The Africa video is amazing, you can call them big dumb beasts all you want but I saw a lot of thought and cooperation that I wish we could achieve in our current state of society.

    When you look at Kerouac you must see the way he thinks, there’s no such thing as a dumb animal. As humans we allow ourselves to think we are better than other creatures, it’s the downfall of our so-called superior intellect.

    All animals possess the intellect they need to live their lives and in most cases it is far more intelligent than the bullshit and lies that we humans heap upon each other for our own satisfaction.

  2. I'm too much of a sap, I had to stop watching when they got baby in the water. Nooooo! I'll try again.

    That's an amazing moment when the cow (or whatever it is) suddenly turns and tries to escape. Those big cats are nasty. *sigh* Mother Nature's a cruel bitch.

  3. Yep, I was jsut at the toronto zoo. animals are so beautiful, what the boy has learned [animal serial killing] is not. and who is really to blame? the parents, of course. and society.

  4. Hi Bruce!!

    Yeah the kid REALLY worries me...I think that killing a deer at the age of five is disgusting. But then I can;t stand hunting. I understand subsistence hunting...but trophy hunting grosses me out.As for the animals I don't like violent animal videos but I thought the water buffalo were magnificent. And the idea of prey turning on predators appeals to me. I wonder why?

    Hi JJ!! Yup me too...the tug of war was too horrible. But since the baby did seem to be ok I just closed my eyes through that part. There actually was a shorter version on You Tube without the crocodile sequence...but it had a ghastly music track :)

    Hi Rashid!! I love all animals...except spiders and snakes :) So the idea of a kid killing them instead of admiring them makes me sick. But of course you're right. It's the parents fault....