I used to roar with laughter when Peter Van Loan got so agitated during Question Period, he'd regularly spill his glass of water all over Stephen Harper, and would be seen frantically hovering over Great Ugly Leader, dabbing his crotch with a paper towel.
Having finally found his station in life. Until Harper fired him, and made him the Minister of Something or Other. Which also suited him fine. Because he's an idiot and he knows it.
But of course now Tubby's back as Con House Leader, he's going after the Canada Pension Plan, and he's acting like Big Bubbah.
On a work day that was already quite stressful, I also had to spend quite a bit of time reassuring some poor seniors, that the Cons were not about to take away their Old Age Assistance.
So when I read that Stephen Harper's grotesque water boy Peter Van Loan was claiming it was all a misunderstanding.
The Harper government moved Monday to assure seniors that it is not going after their Old Age Security. Rather, the government is eyeing reforming the program for the medium and long-term, says Government House Leader Peter Van Loan.
When I was a small boy I used to lie on these dunes near my small Scottish town, stare up at the sky, dream about a place called Canada. And wonder whether there would be bears in Montreal.
These days I find myself thinking a lot about Scotland, and what that country's First Minister likes to say: there are now more pandas in Scotland that there are Con MPs.
Because if Jeffrey Simpson is looking for a clear reason for Scottish independence.
Well he said he wanted to change Canada beyond recognition, so I suppose nobody should be surprised.
Except he said that long ago, and during the last election campaign he posed as a moderate, so this is outrageous.
How dare that twisted little man interpret his mini-majority as a mandate to take Canada where most Canadians don't want to go?
How dare he drag us into a dark neo-con jungle, where Big Oil rules, the rich get richer, the poor get poorer, the young and the old are screwed. And anyone who opposes his reactionary views is labelled an Enemy of the State.
I must admit that I've always had a soft spot in my heart for the people of Newfoundland and Labrador.
Maybe it's because when I was a boy I lived by the sea. On a coastline dotted with small fishing villages that were once so busy and then so still. Maybe it's because they were poor and other people made fun of them. Or maybe it's just because they are some of the warmest, friendliest, funniest people I have ever met.
Newfoundland and Labrador's education department is set to announce plans to help schools across the province create safe, welcoming environments for gay students.
For standing up for bullied children, and sending out such a powerful message.
It was without a doubt the most grotesque spectacle the Davos Cozy Capitalist Club had ever seen. As they sat there in their silk leather pajamas watching Stephen Harper pose as an economist.
Bragging about the stability of our banking system, while forgetting to tell them that if it had been up to him and his Reform Con cowboys our banks would have been deregulated, and in worse shape than those in Europe or the United States.
Bragging about his job creation prowess even though the Canadian economy hasn't created any good jobs for the last six months. Despite all those juicy tax breaks for big corporations.
Lecturing the Europeans about their debt problems, when he turned a surplus into a massive structural deficit. And Canadians are drowning in household debt.
Ballooning household debt has made headlines in recent months, and Bank of Canada Governor Mark Carney has warned it is the No. 1 domestic risk to Canada's economy.
At the mercy of a housing bubble that he helped create.
In the first half of this year (2008), as the subprime mortgage crisis was exploding in the United States, a contagion of U.S.-style lending practices quietly crossed the border and infected Canada's previously prudent mortgage regime.
And now there's no money for anything except prisons, and fancy jet planes. So what's his solution? Make the old work longer. So hopefully more will drop dead before ever collecting any money.
In December, the National Post reported that there was internal debate within the government about increasing the age of eligibility for the other major element of the public pension scheme - Old Age Security - from 65 to 67.
Make sure they build a pipeline to get Alberta's dirty oil to market, by intimidating their opponents, and sabotaging the process by appointing their friends.
The federal government disassociated itself on Thursday from an embarrassing official policy paper that said the country’s independent energy regulator, now studying a controversial oil pipeline, is in fact a government ally.
The Conservative government is confirming what it’s been hinting at for weeks: Spending cuts in the upcoming federal budget could be twice as deep as Ottawa’s original target.
Because making Alberta rich and killing government is all they care about. Even if it drives the rest of the country into a recession.
Oh boy. To think that so many Canadians thought the Cons were good money managers.
Never were so many so dumb. Never was a Canadian government so corrupt and so foul.
The offal in question is what was bobbing in the cauldron. It's organ meat – lamb kidneys, liver, hearts and lungs. Once they were darkly red, glistening specimens of varying texture: firm hearts; resilient, elastic kidneys; puffy, yielding lungs; glutinous liver. Soon, they would be simmered down and ground up.
Golly. It looks like that fancy pajama party in Davos, has considered the state of the capitalist pig, and found its condition rather alarming.
For decades, this ritzy Swiss resort has hosted an annual celebration of capitalism where luxurious Audis ferry potentates and presidents between lavish hotels so they can bemoan the perils of socialism, high taxes and debt. And yet, this year, the veteran founder and Chairman of the Davos World Economic Forum, Professor Klaus Schwab, declares that "Capitalism, in its current form, no longer fits the world around us."
And is so shaken by the situation it's taking a page out of the Occupy movement. Just like Obama did last night.
For all the forced conviviality in the chamber, the most memorable parts of the speech were shaped not by shenanigans in Washington, but by the protests in the streets that have shifted the focus of the nation from debt and government-bashing to the enduring inequalities and inequities in American society.
Because they can see the writing on the wall, and the power of an idea whose time has come. Unlike Stephen Harper.
He has always been a bully. They say it gives him pleasure to see fear in the eyes of others. He has always treated his opponents like enemies to be destroyed.
Now as he turns this country into a sinister prison state, anyone who opposes him is an Enemy of Canada.
In a sworn affidavit released Tuesday to The Canadian Press, Andrew Frank says he was told by his supervisor at ForestEthics that a PMO official had referred to their organization as an "enemy of the state." The affidavit describes how staff were told their jobs were at risk after the official told Tides Canada, which supports the work of ForestEthics, that the government would "take down" all of the agency's projects unless it cut ForestEthics loose.
The masters of the Big Lie deny it. But who would believe anything they say, when their record speaks for itself?
I suppose it was inevitable. He was born to be a comedian. First it was Rob Ford the Mayor, then it was Rob Ford the Cannon Doll, now it's Rob Ford:The Opera.
Described as a “surrealist fantasy based loosely upon the personality of Toronto’s current and much discussed mayor,” Rob Ford: The Opera is a tragicomic tale about a man who is by turns bumbling, petulant, obtuse, delusional, lonely and ultimately doomed by those he has wronged.
I must say the synopsis sounds excellent. And I'm sure I would have loved the ending.
And then, seizing Atwood’s wings, Ford vanishes, never to be seen again.
The only explanation given is that, like Icarus, he has flown too close to the sun. And a Brechtian moral is provided by Ford’s sadder-but-wiser parents: “A thief is a thief until he’s caught.”
But I don't know if I would have been able to laugh as loudly as the audience apparently did. Not when a buffoon is a buffoon, but he's still the Mayor of Toronto.
Oh no. It seems that Tony Clement's view of reality may once again be somewhat limited.
A senior federal bureaucrat has contradicted Tony Clement’s insistence that he was not involved in dividing a $50-million fund to spruce up his riding before the 2010 G8 summit.
Once Minister Clement’s office provided the list of recommended projects to Minister Baird’s office, FedNor officials transferred the catalogue of projects to Infrastructure Canada officials. All 242 project proposals were sent; this included the 32 projects which were recommended by Minister Clement.”
Which of course is NOT what Tony-o told the Public Accounts Committee:
Golly. I don't know why so many people in the inbred village of Ottawa seem to suffer from Big Daddy Fever.
The tendency to portray Stephen Harper as a political genius, instead of a deranged right-wing nerd who is slowly killing this country.
But this is ridiculous:
“I think by making this about foreign interests, U.S. money, not allowing ourselves to be held hostage by the U.S, the government's been very smart and been able not only to take advantage of an opportunity, but also take advantage of something Canadians are thinking anyway,” Mr. Armour said.
I couldn't make it to London, Ontario today. And I was so disappointed. For it must have been a stirring sight.
A crowd of more than 10,000 descended upon this city’s Victoria Park to support local workers who have been locked out of their jobs since the new year. They came from all over, from Timmins, Sudbury, and Pennsylvania in scores of buses. They came to protest corporate greed and Stephen Harper.
I would have liked to hear this angry message to Great Chicken Leader:
“We need you down here to support Canadian workers,” yelled London Mayor Joe Fontana. “Get your ass down here!”
Who was invited, but like the other three Con MP's from the area, was too scared to show up.
This graphic speaks for itself eh? The day before and the day after the internet revolution.
Then Wednesday happened, and suddenly everyone seemed to understand how serious this was. Wikipedia went dark, and the country wailed; we realized how much we have come to depend on the crowdsourced encyclopedia. Google hung a black sash on its logo. Crowds marched in protest. Facebook issued an uncharacteristically political statement (although we urged it to go further). Network news could not fail to take note.
In short: the Internet got its act together, and the world shook.
And now it's time to say hooray for us.
So, well done, Internet. You did it. You took a relatively obscure bill and you made the world care. One concerted day of action by you shook Washington to its core. Lobbyists like Dodd who have had too much unquestioned control for too long got served notice. There’s a new power player in town; not one man in a suit, but millions of faces with electronic megaphones. And this power player doesn’t take kindly to bills that threaten its behavior.
Of course, before I killed SOPA, by going to blackblue.
I had to ask myself some hard questions about my own behaviour.
Oh dear. I see that Stephen Harper's pathetic attempt to threaten Obama has been met with a chuckle and a shrug.
The Obama administration is unfazed by Canadian warnings that delays in the Keystone XL pipeline review will add urgency to Ottawa’s effort to ship crude oil to China, U.S. Ambassador David Jacobson says.
And no wonder eh? When Harper is only helping Obama's enemies.
In condemning the ruling, Republican house Leader John Boehner accused President Obama of “shipping American energy security to China.”
And like our homegrown oil pimps, the bonehead Boehner doesn't know what he's doing or talking about. It's his fault for playing cheap politics. And that oil isn't going to America, it's going to China.
It's like a recurring nightmare. The ugly images, the leering voice. Stephane Dion is NOT a leader. Michael Ignatieff didn't come back for you. Jack Layton did it once he'll do it again.
And now comes the latest attack ad from the diseased brain of Stephen Harper: Thomas Mulcair is NOT a Canadian.
Thomas Mulcair, the Quebec MP and NDP leadership contender, carries two passports. One is Canadian, the other is French.
In Toronto, Mayor Rob Ford sees his reckless budget derailed.
Who says you can’t fight City Hall? Torontonians who successfully pushed back against Mayor Rob Ford’s reckless cuts are the real winners in this year’s budget process. By the hundreds, they came to all-night public meetings; they inundated city councillors with expressions of concern; they tweeted, blogged and organized and, in many cases, took to the street in protest.
It worked. Indeed, democracy worked. By a slim majority city council voted to take almost $19 million from last year’s surplus and use it to save pools and homeless shelters, daycare services, and recreation programs including ice rink hours and library services.
He's always been an oil pimp, but I thought I better give him a new costume eh?
Because these days that's ALL he ever talks about.
"When you look at the Iranians threatening to block the Strait of Hormuz, I think that just illustrates how critical it is that supply for the United States be North American," he said.
When in fact the Iranians can't block the Strait of Hormuz, Americans only want our dirty oil so they can ship it to China. And the Enbridge pipeline is all about giving China our raw bitumen just like they took our forests.
Uh oh. Duck and cover. It looks as if Great Oil Pimp Leader is trying to whip us into a nationalistic frenzy, by demanding that the United States stop treating us like a national park.
Any decision on developments such as the proposed Northern Gateway pipeline should be left to Canadians, Prime Minister Stephen Harper says.
"Just because certain people in the United States would like to see Canada be one giant national park for the northern half of North America, I don't think that's part of what our review process is all about."
Gawd. I made a terrible mistake today. I allowed my Dad to drag me off to see the Margaret Thatcher movie The Iron Lady.
And all I can say is I'm glad he paid for the tickets, because it was absolutely hideous.
Any reasonably aware audience will feel exhausted and discomfited after two hours of this exercise in cinematic navel-gazing. Thatcherism cast a long shadow, and The Iron Lady, in its ever-so-watchable way, does little to illuminate it. Quite the contrary; much like last year’s Nicolas Sarkozy biopic La Conquête, it’s a subtle form of propaganda, asking the audience to see the beauty in the beast.
Well, even if my leftie student days are long over, I can’t abide hypocrisy. I left the theatre mumbling Billy Bragg’s advice in the Thatcher-era song It Says Here: “When you wake to the fact that your paper is Tory, just remember, there are two sides to every story.”
But even that review isn't harsh enough, because the movie totally fails to reflect the pain that Con beast inflicted on the poor in Britain. Declaring that "there is no such thing as society" while mothers and children chanted "Thatcher Thatcher Milk Snatcher."
Or totally ignores the terrible damage she did to a generation of gay kids with her fascist Section 28.
Human Resources Minister Diane Finley is boosting staff at Service Canada to help reduce a mounting backlog in employment insurance claims that is forcing many jobless Canadians to wait months for their first benefits cheque.
The delays have been growing since October, 2010, even as Service Canada laid off hundreds of employees from its processing centres and allowed staff at its call centres to leave without being replaced.
I don't know why the Unrepentant Old Hippie feels she has the right to dump on progressives, in such a foamy manner, for having the decency to defend the human rights of gays and lesbians.
Especially since she regularly accuses progressives who despise Stephen Harper and his foul Cons, of suffering from "Harper Derangement Symptom." And probably voted for him, because like him she thinks Big Government and taxes are bad, capitalism and greed are good, anyone left of Michael Ignatieff is a commie, the Canadian occupiers are spoiled kids and rabid animals, and Great Not So Bad leader promised to kill her hated gun registry.
He can try to hide behind big legal words. He can claim he didn't know. But nobody can deny that this is a brutal assault on gay people.
The Harper government is being accused of taking away same-sex rights by “stealth” in light of a surprise government stand that non-resident gay and lesbian couples who flocked to Canada to exchange vows really aren’t legally married after all.
He can claim he isn't reopening the gay marriage debate, when this stealth offensive, like the one on abortion, was carefully crafted by the religious fanatics that run the PMO. And he is reopening the debate, by sticking a knife into the side of gay equality.
For most Canadians, same-sex marriage is a settled issue and part of the landscape. Despite some people’s fears, Stephen Harper’s government hasn’t used its majority to reopen the marriage debate in Parliament. But in two recent cases, government lawyers are taking a position that is inconsistent with gay men’s and lesbians’ hard-fought equality.
When I heard that Pope Benny had described gay marriage as a threat to humanity at first I was shocked.
"This is not a simple social convention, but rather the fundamental cell of every society. Consequently, policies which undermine the family threaten human dignity and the future of humanity itself," he said.
For what would that old monkey know about humanity? And how could a former member of the Hitler Youth make such a genocidal statement?
And then I felt guilty. For NOT being married, but living in sin with my boyfriend. Like Benny and his boyfriend Gorgeous Georg Gänswein.
Well in case anyone didn't understand why the Harper Cons are calling native people and environmentalists "radicals" and "foreign interests."
Leave it up to Tom "Strangelove" Flanagan to explain Big Oil's plan for Total World Domination.
The branding of opponents as "radicals" is part of a strategy to make sure the pipeline gets built, argues Tom Flanagan, Prime Minister Stephen Harper's former chief of staff and an expert on aboriginal issues.
Flanagan said there is a concerted world-wide attack against the oil industry."Shrugging it off, I don't think, is good enough anymore. It's a battle and you have to start pushing back."
Which is at least refreshingly honest eh? Big Oil Uber Alles. But unfortunately, in the case of Canada, The Plan is tragically flawed.
Canadian pipeline builder Enbridge reported a leak from one of its pipelines on the day public hearings began into the company’s planned Northern Gateway pipeline.
And don't you love this?
Enbridge declined to describe how it could be safe to continue operating a pipeline that may be leaking.
But why is Joe Oliver quaking quacking like a teabagger?
I notice that some of the trees in Toronto have started sprouting buds, fooled by the unusually warm weather into thinking that Spring has arrived in January.
And no doubt feeling like many Liberals are feeling today.
But I know an icy wind will soon sweep in and freeze those buds off the branches. And as someone whose only partisan goal is to defeat Stephen Harper's ghastly Cons, I see trouble ahead for all of us.
You know....if you needed a cheap and apparently inexhaustible source of natural gas to heat your home, you could do worse than connecting a hose to Joe Oliver's big mouth and another one to his other vibrating orifice.
Environmental and other "radical groups" are trying to block trade and undermine Canada's economy, Natural Resources Minister Joe Oliver said Monday.
Oliver says the groups "threaten to hijack our regulatory system to achieve their radical ideological agenda," stack the hearings with people to delay or kill "good projects," attract "jet-setting" celebrities and use funding from "foreign special interest groups."
Because surely there can be no greater and more absurd gaseous emission than that, when no group in this country is more radical and ideological than Stephen Harper's ghastly Cons.
When I saw the Star headline today I was stunned. Could Stephen Harper and Vladimir Putin really be planning to face off against each other on the ice?
Prime Minister Stephen Harper is making plans to play on a Canadian hockey team in two exhibition games against a Russian squad that will include Prime Minister Vladimir Putin, sources tell the Star.
“We’ve been told that the PM would love to be involved. It’s as relaxed as that,” said a person familiar with Harper’s plans.
Golly. I don't think I'm going to have to consult my horoscope to find out where I'm going to be, and what I'm going to be doing on Saturday the 21st of January. Because I already know.
And why am I so excited I'm marching around my house beating my drum already? Because I believe this ugly lockout will be a turning point in Canadian history, and will mark the beginning of the real resistance to the Harper regime.
When I was a young boy living in a Scottish village that didn't have a movie theatre, one of my teachers used to thrill me and the other kids, by hauling out an ancient projector and playing an educational movie.
And many of those movies were made by the National Film Board of Canada. I can't remember what they were about, except that it was always a magical moment. So I've been a fan of the NFB ever since.
In the mid-nineties I was horrified when the Liberals slashed its budget by about thirty percent. Every year its budget gets smaller and smaller. And I shudder to think what the Cons might do to it now that they have a majority.
Because it's a Canadian treasure.
As more evidence of that I offer up one of its latest little gems. It's called Wild Life. It tells the story of a young Englishman who sets out for Alberta in 1909, hoping to become a successful rancher.
Only to find out it was harder than he thought....
Yup. Please don't let the Cons destroy the NFB, like they are planning to destroy the CBC.
He's always been a nerdly chickenhawk. Posing as a Great Warrior Leader, inflating and deflating like a blimp, depending on the prevailing political winds.
He's never seen a war he didn't like, from the one in 1812 to the one in Libya, and now Stephen Harper is frantically flapping his stubby wings again, trying to pump up a war against Iran.
Which is particularly alarming, since tensions in the region are escalating, and the more political leaders talk about war the more likely it becomes.
Well there he was today, posing in front of another carefully composed human backdrop, shrugging off the latest grim economic news.
Choosing instead to go after environmental groups and native people opposed to the construction of a pipeline.
While ignoring the many lobbyists from Big Oil who tell him what to do, and the many locked out workers in this country that are being ground into the dirt by big American companies.
And choosing the timing of his newser with military precision, check the time on the picture, in order to avoid having to answer questions about these latest porky appointments.
Oh no. I knew Ezra Levant's obsession with Chiquita Banana would end badly. First he lost control of his senses, now he's lost control of his bowelsmouth.
Winding up a 10-minute denunciation of the banana company’s decision to boycott oil from Alberta’s tarsands deposits, Levant signed off his Dec. 22 broadcast thusly: “Hey . . . Manuel Rodriguez, chinga tu madre.”
The epithet, widely used in Mexico but not in the rest of the Spanish-speaking world, means, crudely, to have carnal relations with your mother.
Now look I understand that "chinga tu madre" along with "otra cerveza por favor" are the only Spanish words most redneck hosers ever learn at a cheap resort in Mexico.
Well I see that Great Choo Choo Leader is trying to put some distance between him and the lockout at the Electro-Motive plant in London, Ontario.
Even though he once used the factory to shill his corporate tax cuts.
"This is a dispute between a private company and the union and we don't comment on the actions of private companies," Harper spokesman Carl Vallee responded Wednesday in an email.
The prime minister showed no such reticence on Mar. 19, 2008 when he visited the Electro-Motive plant to showcase a $5 million federal tax break for buyers of the diesel locomotive-maker's wares and a wider $1 billion tax break on industrial capital investment.
Now I can understand why Stephen Harper is running away from those job-killing tax breaks. Because it must be so embarrassing to be exposed as a total fraud. And he's such a miserable coward.
But why is he refusing to stand up for Canadian workers who are being treated like animals by an American company? Why does he hate Canada soooooo much?
It was -17 degrees in London, Ontario, today, where a foreign company has locked out 400 Canadian workers. To try to slash their wages and benefits by more than fifty percent, and gut their pensions.
And in Alma, Quebec, where another foreign company has locked out 700 Canadian workers, and is using the courts to club them like seals, it was even colder.
But don't worry eh? The big bosses in this country are warm and toasty.
Stephen Harper greased Electro-Motive's wheels three years ago with a big wad of our tax dollars.
If London's Electro-Motive plant is closed and its jobs moved to Indiana, it'll be after having milked the benefits of a billion-dollar tax break once trumpeted on the plant floor by Prime Minister Stephen Harper.
And like every other corporate giant in Canada, the company just got another juicy tax break from the Harper government. For doing less than nothing.
Praise the Dark Lord. I see that Stephen Harper has a shiny new present for his religious base.
Early in 2012, the Tories will finally flesh out a campaign promise to install the Office of Religious Freedom within the secular confines of the Department of Foreign Affairs – a controversial pledge that has drawn accusations of vote pandering and blurring lines between church and state.
To whom he is beholden, for faithfully sending him the cash he needs to fund his Office of Perpetual Political Warfare.
To which I say Hallelujah and God bless his righteous majority.
But here's what confuses me eh? How can he stand up for religious freedom abroad, and ignore what is happening in his own Calgary backyard? Does he really support Ezra Levant's bigot excrement?
Is this the Office of Religious Freedom? Or the Office of Selective Bigotry Against Women, Gays, and Muslims?
