Doug Ford's Most Horrible and Devastating Day

With only three days to go before the Ontario election, Doug Ford's Team Harper's handlers have been taking no chances.

Keeping him in a bubble most of the day, lest he say something really dumb, or soil himself.

But sadly for him, and the Harperites, today it just didn't work.

When the bubble or the balloon burst.



And Dougie hit the ground with a sickening thud, just short of the finishing line.

First he found himself defending another one of his handpicked candidates from those demanding he be fired. 

Doug Ford is standing by his hand-picked candidate in Scarborough-Guildwood, a Toronto police officer who is now under investigation over a threatening email he insists is fake. Rival parties are demanding the Progressive Conservative leader drop Roshan Nallaratnam as a candidate in Thursday’s election.

Then he was forced to claim that he is a "strong believer in tough gun control." 

After being caught on tape saying this:

“Guns don’t kill people, crazy people with guns kill people. Safe gun owners, how many times have you ever heard a responsible gun owner killing someone?”

Which no doubt put a few more holes in what was left of his credibility.

And probably left many Torontonians wondering whether Dougie would take us back to the scary days when him and his brother Robbie ran the city.

And it seemed like everyone around Robbie kept getting arrested, or shot...



Like two of his friends in that photo.

But as bad as all of that was, what came next was worse. 

When Robbies's widow, Renata Ford, hit him and his other brother Randy with a $16.2 million lawsuit. 

Former Toronto mayor Rob Ford’s widow and children are suing his brother, Ontario Progressive Conservative Leader Doug Ford, alleging that he was a negligent business manager who cost the late mayor’s family millions and deprived them of the money left behind to support them.

Which since it also alleged that Dougie was too ignorant and/or too incompetent to run a label company.

Couldn't be more devastating for a man hoping to be the next Premier of Ontario.

The lawsuit describes a company without a coherent business plan, where Mr. Ford and his brother have resisted hiring professional managers and have provided friends and family members with jobs they aren’t qualified to hold.

And no doubt ruined this photo opportunity...



But at least we know what we have to do to stop that Con clown: get our people to vote, and make sure every vote counts. 

But pity the poor Cons, stuck with a beast they can't control...



What can they do to avoid humiliation? 

Except jump off a tall building.

Or jump into a swimming pool. 

And join the Trillium Party...



Lordy. I swear this campaign is a David Lynch production, choreographed by Ezra Levant. 

Except it's only too real.

There are only three days left to answer these two vital questions:

When will Dougie reveal his inner beast.



And when will we find out what he's hiding?

The lives of millions of people are at stake.

And failure is not an option...