Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Superhumans, Ugly Goblins and Bitch Bishops

Of all the disturbing stories in the news today, I found the one about how humans could one day split into a genetic upper class and a lower class the most shocking.

"The descendants of the genetic upper class would be tall, slim, healthy, attractive, intelligent, and creative and a far cry from the "underclass" humans who would have evolved into dim-witted, ugly, squat goblin-like creatures.

And the most frightening.... Oh not because of this :

" will exhibit symmetrical facial features, look athletic, and have squarer jaws, deeper voices and BIGGER PENISES...."

I don't want to appear immodest but .....ahem....I think I'm ahead of my time in that regard... Just like I think that women are not going to object to having

".....smooth, hairless skin, large clear eyes, pert breasts, glossy hair, and even features."

Never mind those perty breasts. Just think how much time they'll save not having to shave their legs.

No the reason I find it horribly spooky is because it appears that the dim-witted, ugly, squat goblin-like creatures are already here.

Can you believe it? All those Catholic priests meeting in..... Cornwall? You know the place where they had that big sex scandal. Talk about rubbing or pushing it in. You think they could have had the decency to hold this Klown Klan Conference in Mexico.

Still I understand the authorities have changed the town's name to Cornhole for the duration of the Konference to warn people away. The children have all been ordered off the streets after dark. And the priests are staggering about with medieval Opus Dei chastity devices clamped to their allegedly shrivelled up penises.

So the kids should be safe until all the victims are counted. And the Nazi Pope is arrested for trying to cover it up.

Now if only we could screw a few clamps on their theocratic tongues....

"....Canada's Catholic church is positioning itself to take a much more active role in the country's politics....."

"Our allies in this are fundamentalist Christians and Muslims," Weisgerber said. "We really need in Canada to support families."

Wow! Kawabunga! Heil Mary! Isn't that exciting. Not only is the Catholic Church prepared to sacrifice its tax breaks. For the sake of a little gay blood. But it looks as if these bitch bishops are planning to sic these medieval hordes on us as well....

Now look I've got nothing against fancy dress costumes....

But that's SCAAAAARY !....Not just because I really hate the idea of being thrown off tall buildings.(I hate flying without a plane and hard landings) Or being stoned to death. Or having assorted limbs chopped off. Or my large dick sawn off with a chainsaw.

But because you never know how many homophobes....... or penguins are hiding under there.

Still that does give me an idea....

Mummy......Mummy....Sebastien....Sebastien.......please.......please..... PLEASE ?????!!!!!

Can I can wear MY mask too?

Oh goody goody!

The way I see it......If these crazy hatemongering theocon goblins want to give us a really scary Halloween.

Why don't we give them one too?



  1. gee,, think harper meeting with a lobby group of catholic women (first time a pm has done so in 24 years) and snubbing dalton mcguinty for a meeting is any indication of the dogans gaining political power?

    we could always get jaghi singh to catapult teddy bears again...that seems to have scared the lib power mongers enough, i'm sure it would have the cons crapping their pants. weapons of love. frighttening to a theocracy.

  2. Hi Scout....I'm afraid it is. I can't believe how much access these theocons have to Harper's inner circle. It doesn't make sense from a political point of view.He has everything to lose and nothing to gain from being too closely associated with these nutbars. But what nobody seems to realize is that Harper isn't just using these people, as conventional wisdom would have it. As hard as it may be for Canadians to grasp this fact, he's actually one of them! One of those pod people and theocon bodysnatchers. That's the really really scary part....